An Inaugural

Day 898, 14:58 • Published in USA USA • by Harrison Richardson
America, from the bottom of my heart, thank you for once again electing me to the Presidency.

I wanted to write this article last night, but sadly, evil PHOENIX PTO'ers from the company AT&T decided to shut off my internet connection. I take this as a direct attack on America. I will not stand idly by while these evil ne'er dowells hack away at my precious internet. As a result, I have formed the Secret Service. Good day.

On a more serious note, I am ready to get to work. While I was offline, I had the chance to sit down and avoid the typical election day pressures and write down a list of my goals. If you haven't done that in a while, do it. Just sit down and write some goals. I had many. Reducing government bureaucracy, making the public more aware of the inner workings of government, training new leaders, and even a new approach to foreign policy. This article sets in motion a term that will seek to streamline the Office of the President and the staff who work within it.

Speaking of staff, here is the makings of my cabinet:

President: Harrison Richardson
Vice President: Chocolate McSkittles
Chief of Staff: St Krems
Secretary of Defense: Angelini
Secretary of the Interior: Herr Vootsman
Deputy Secretary of the Interior - Civil Anarchy*
Secretary of the Media: David Landon
Secretary of State: Colin Lantrip
Deputy Secretary of State: Mr. Hyphenated
Secretary of the Treasury: Publius
Secretary of Technology: Dmgctrl*

Senior Counselor: Inwegen
Senior Advisers: Tiacha, Emerick, Josh Frost
Advisers: Lieutenant Schiesskopf, Joe Newton, Blazix
Assistant to the President for National Security: Gen. NXNW
* - Yet to formally accept

As you can see, we have massive cabinet cuts. The Department of the Interior alone used to be 9 separate politically appointed jobs; I have reduced this to two. There is no reason why the Salvation Army needs a new director each term. That is a position that can be filled by one person who can do the job for several months at a time. Depoliticizing these medium level departmental jobs will enable the Department Secretary to fill it with a knowledgeable person instead of the President choosing a political ally to give them an undeserved job. Everyone wins. In addition to this, cutting down on the size of the cabinet reduces the top heavy feel of the government. The positions above constitute the cabinet; this is not to say that these are the only positions that will be filled. Secretaries may or may not choose a deputy, but they do so at their own will and with my approval. With luck, this change will allow Presidential transitions to take closer to one day rather than the typical four. Sub-cabinet positions will continue to be filled in the coming days.

On a policy note, foreign policy will take most of my time in the coming days. Along with State Department officials and some from the Joint Chiefs, I will embark on negotiations with India to retain Karnatka. I hope that these negotiations are fruitful and all sides reach an agreement that is manageable. I hope the Indians do not quickly forget the Americans who gave up their right to vote domestically to help save India from a Political Take Over threat. I am optimistic of a solution that aids all sides.

I have also looked in to expanding the Arm America (better known as Guns 4 Huns) program. I see this as a way to increase retention and massively rank up our population.

I have formed #whitehouse.public on Rizon IRC as a one-stop shop for anyone looking for a government official. I hope people use it.

Finally, Americans, I urge you to defend and fight for Croatia against all of her invaders. Croatia is an ally that has stood by the US on numerous occasions. The United States is involved via MPP here, so as long as DOD orders don't say otherwise, I hope you will fight to defend our brothers. Let's get America high up on the damage charts.



HR