Join the new world

A Little Notice: I've decided to take a break from the political sphere of eRepublik. So, I'll be systematically leaving my posts. I have left the FA department today, I will not be running for re-election for party president of Saoirse on the 15th, and I will not be running for re-election for TD on the 25th. I will be finishing out my terms. I hope some talent replaces me in these positions.

A New Direction

Introduction

I've decided to take my newspaper in a new direction; political satire. I decided to try out this direction since I haven't seen many satire papers being published in the eIrish media, other than those attempts from the eBrits, but we all know they lack talent. So the article that follows will be my experiment.



Hello, Mr. President. May I shake your hand?

Day 867 of the New World marked a momentous day in eIrish History. It marked the end of the presidential campaigns for the April elections. But these were no ordinary campaigns; they were clean. This style of democracy was even believed to be extinct in eIrish politics, and thus shocked the tiny island.

However, this miracle has its down sides. Ordinarily, after the presidential elections, twenty days are spent cleaning up the mud from the campaigns. eIrelad is left with 1700 eIrish wondering, "Now what?".


A new gesture in eIrish politics

We can shout louder...

Tensions with the eUK have reached hilarious levels. The eIrish media is now home to Republican rabble rousers, bored eBrits, and Bros. The media war is just heating up.

I've asked each group to voice their opinion, because we just can't get enough of it.

The Republican: "Free the North! End the suffering! No more oppression! Tiocfaidh ár lá! Tiocfaidh ár lá! Tiocfaidh ár lá!"

The eBrit: "Wouldn't it be just droll to unify the Irish island under the British flag? Would you allow such a maneuver? We wouldn't like to intrude."

The Bro: &quot😉on't worry 'bout it bro, you got us!"

Well, I guess it really comes down to which president can shout louder. The winner? Patton. GLaDOS thought he got eIreland good when he set the national goal to capture Dublin. Patton, the old warmonger, set the national goal to capture both Northern Ireland, and London. That's two regions to the eUKs one. You can't help but wonder, "What you gonna do about it GLaDOS?".

Patton, I award you this victory shirt:


Bro?

eIreland has found itself a pretty "choice" alliance. The Bros know how to through a party. The Bros always treat you right too, and it seems like more and more join the ranks of this eFrat Party everyday.


The only way to explain the Brolliance.

Fin.

Thanks for reading. I hope you enjoyed it. Votes and subs are appreciated. Comment and let me know what you think.