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A Break in the Monotony

Day 2,352, 13:44 Published in United Kingdom United Kingdom by Massacar
Hello Everyone, It is I, Massacar



So there's been a lot of political stuff going on as per usual in the eUK. This article is just to give everyone a couple of seconds away from the nasty eWorld of politics.
I do not take creative credit for the materials expressed below.

René Descartes walks into a bar and orders a drink. When he's done, the bartender asks him whether he wants another. Descartes says "I think not." Poof! He disappears
(Cogito ergo sum)"I think, therefore I am"This is my favorite


As pothead walks down the road, a genie appears in front of him. "I'll grant you two wishes," says the genie.
The pothead replies, "I want a never ending joint."
The genie says, "As you wish," and gives him the joint.
The pothead takes a long drag and says, "Awesome! I want another one!"


What's the difference between light and hard?
You can go to sleep with the light on.


What's the definition of a good farmer?
A man outstanding in his field


What do you call a man with no arms and no legs playing in the leaves?
Russell!


What did the worker at the rubber band factory say when he lost his job?
Oh Snap


What do Eskimos get from sitting on the ice for too long?
Polaroids


What did one snowman say to the other snowman?
Do you smell carrots?


What do you call it when a dinosaur crashes his car?
Tyrannosaurus Wrecks


What do you call a pig that does karate?
A PORK CHOP


Why did the cookie go to the hospital?
Because he felt crummy.

What do you do with epileptic lettuce?
You make a seizure salad!
Hope you were all mildly amused.
Vote, Sub, Shout

Thanks for reading, o7
Massacar
 

Comments

Alphabethis
Alphabethis Day 2,352, 13:54

sehr gut

Massacar
Massacar Day 2,352, 13:57

Danke

WayneKerr
WayneKerr Day 2,352, 14:06

I'd take two never ending joints...

ViciousDeeds
ViciousDeeds Day 2,353, 04:29

i like a bit of variety though..... nothing worse than building up immunity

Yossarian Afudyakno
Yossarian Afudyakno Day 2,352, 14:47

The amusement I endured was intensely mild, but worthy of a vote.

Massacar
Massacar Day 2,352, 14:48

I never claimed to be a skilled comic (Thank god, otherwise i'd be the biggest liar in the eUK). I just thought that there should be more entertainment articles out there to provide a chance at variety.

Yossarian Afudyakno
Yossarian Afudyakno Day 2,352, 14:53

I fully appreciate it! I try to inject awful humour into these dark times, too. A worthy endeavour.

Teppishc Day 2,354, 04:32

Comment deleted

Teppishc
Teppishc Day 2,354, 04:33

I am therefore I drink

 
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