[GUIDE] The Secret of a Succesful eArticle

Day 1,859, 13:34 Published in Bulgaria Bulgaria by Simonymous
Have you wondered why your articles don't get enough votes? May be you don't want to spend big money on buying votes? Or you haven't yet written one and don't know how to start? Worry no more! I'll teach you in this simple guide.

First, you need an original logo like this

Then, you need some text like this:

No one reads this No one reads this No one reads this No one reads this No one reads this No one reads this No one reads this No one reads this No one reads this No one reads this
* No one reads this
* No one reads this
* No one reads this
No one reads this No one reads this No one reads this No one reads this No one reads this No one reads this No one reads this No one reads this No one reads this No one reads this
Then, you need some icebreaker:

Then, some more text:
No one reads this No one reads this No one reads this No one reads this No one reads this No one reads this No one reads this No one reads this No one reads this
//Note - remember to use bold, italic and underline. They are cool. People like them. Girls, too.
Again, fun stuff:

Now you need to make sure that you have everybody's vote. How can you do that? It's easy.
1) Start with the patriots:
"And remember, guys, our country is the best!!!
Hail Country!
Hail Alliance!
Fail Other Country!
Fail Other Alliance!
2)Now the girls:
Unicorns, feelings, all people are equal, more feelings, johnny depp, bla, bla, cute puppy, love cats..
You may even insert a romantic picture

3)Why stop there? Win the trolls:
bh stealers, gold stealers, stupid politicians, you name it
4)And now, waaait for it:
The bombs! This part will win 95% of your votes! Guaranteed.

And then you finish with
"For shout
(insert name)
(insert link)

And that's it! No need for voters club, giving away of tanks and stuff. Pure and simple!
If you didn't enjoy my article, vote and GTFO my property!