An Introduction To S.E.E.S.

Day 803, 12:27 • Published in USA USA • by S.E.E.S


GENTLEMEN,

The more observant will have noticed our name cropping up here and there, usually associated with some Great deed, and will have wondered to yourself, "what is this S.E.E.S. and why do I feel confused sexually whenever I think about them?" I admit this was partly our intention. We have been working behind the scenes for a while now, moving with super ninja skills, directing events to their inevitable conclusion.

When Josh Frost released the last ever article written by Emerick, that was us. When the government run Flufferton Award was hijacked and subsequently stopped failing, that was us. When Meghan logged on to find her donation log full of people donating the whale food, that was us. When you came, that was us. When Colombia, the ancient enemy of Emericka, suffered an attack on their MM that severly harmed their financial revenues, that was us. When Aeros made a Whambulance thread on the eUS forums, that was us.


Emerick - Now in 4 shades of Awesome

People of Emericka you should not fear us. We work among you to spread Greatness through our actions and thereby to inspire this entire country to be less fail. At this point I must ask all Jews to look away, or at least bathe before reading further. Thanks. Our organisation's goals our simple, our methods cruel and our means limitless. Accept your Greatness Emericka, or suffer the consequences. We understand that accepting Greatness is a hard task to have thrust upon you so suddenly, and to aid you in this we have drawn up a list of demands to be met:

1. We demand the return of The Temple of Emerick to the eUS forums. The Admin's claim that it was removed by Emerick himself is true to an extent, but while adventuring through the depths of the Removed From Sight board one of our operatives found a post from Emerick demanding the return of the board to it's rightful place.

2. In a recent article that displayed quite a few characteristic qualities of win, Max McFarland 2 described his rescue of Emerick's comatose body from the foul curry smelling hands of AgentChieftain and of the body's subsequent relocation to its new resting place, somewhere in Ohio. Max has asked President Jewitt to place a Defence System in Ohio to help defend Emerick's body from ne'er-do-wells, even offered to pay for the system himself but Jewitt, who's heart knows only the ways of economics and usury, laughed and said no. His unwashed side-kick PigInZen then proceeded to taunt Max with PMs, much like how I taunt homeless people with turds that look like chocolate bars. We demand that the government repent its fgt ways and take the proper actions to immediately insure Emerick's Body's safety.



3. We demand that every Presidential Cabinet from now on include a Secretary of Greatness, chosen from among the members of S.E.E.S. so that the President can be kept informed of the wants and needs of Emerick The Great.

4. We Demand the name of the country be changed back to the Confederate States of America (CSA) because Emerick never wanted the name to be changed and was Greatly offended when it was done.

5. Finally we demand that Dan Wang be immediately turned over to our custody so that we may sacrifice him at the appointed time in order to pave the way for Emerick's Ascension to his Godhead. There can be no substitutes, Emerick has spoken. You heard us Emericka, bring us Dan Wang.



If these demands are not met before the end of day 809 of the new world we will continue and intensify our eTerrorism. We will also get really pissy. If you think we have shown the full extent of our power you are very mistaken. We have more gold then most small countries. Our members have penetrated the highest levels of all governmental branches (except the military, they're p gay inorite?).

We have some of the best and brightest people in this country in our organization that will stop at nothing to see Emericka become Great. Oh yeah I should mention that some of our members have chosen not to reveal themselves publicly as part of S.E.E.S. This is so that they can better serve Emerick.

As a reward for reading all the way to the end you get to watch this video, which was provided NagaPrathyush, one of Emerick's many followers from other countries. It's truly awesome. Props to Rainysunday for pointing out this video and Fingerguns for making some cool graphics.

Watch Here

Do not fight us, Emericka, instead join us. Quality Über Alles. One Nation, united with one goals. Together We Can Kill Dan Wang!

Also, we endorse Zoli for POTUS.

If you want to learn more about S.E.E.S. then visit our website by clicking on Emerick underneath. We are accepting applications, but its unlikely that you will get accepted. Cause your a fgt.