[ZW] LITERARY MASTERSTROKES UNEARTHED

Day 851, 14:35 • Published in Pakistan Pakistan • by AgentChieftain

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KARACHI, Pakistan - Gentlemen, might I ask what is with all the pig squealing in our media? All I've been hearing for the past week are the cries and lamentations of those who have distanced themselves from the core of Pakistan. It's rather annoying, and if it doesn't stop, I'm going to have to start throwing shoes.

Anyways.

It brings me great joy to announce that the literary works of Commisirro el Cigar have been rediscovered in the remains of a cigar factory in Sindh. While I was drilling the Serbian army during a routine training exercise in the abandoned industrial district of the city of Karachi, I was informed that two Serbian sentries discovered a cache of vintage Pakistani cigars.

Recalling the Commisirro and his works during the Beta era, I quickly rushed to the area and began searching the warehouse in which the cigars were found. Using my Demiwig powers (which I will discuss in my next article), I cleared away debris and eventually found the door to Commisirro's office. In this office, I found the entirety of Commisirro el Cigar's writings.

"I am Commisirro El Cigar. I smoke Cigars. I am now a member of the divine 300 which shall bring peace upon the world, just as Cigars did before me. But Commisirro, I hear you asking, how did Cigars bring peace to the world? To that I say to you, I say, as long as Cigar smoking men were fighting for their land, there was peace."
-Commisirro el Cigar, from "The Cigar Of Peace Is Being Lit"

I ask you all to read through his works and revere him, for he was one of the greatest writers of the former Pakistani Empire.

EDITOR'S NOTE: Regarding the introduction, do not argue about it in the comments.

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