[The Coconut Wars] A battle hard fought and a victory well deserved!

Day 1,832, 12:17 • Published in India India • by Uv Ajed




Thought of the day: It is better to conquer yourself than to win a thousand battles. Then the victory is yours. It cannot be taken from you, not by angels or by demons, heaven or hell.

Prologue:
Off late, the Thai Govt. and couple of others had taken our soft spoken CP's diplomatic ways as a sign of our weakness. They predicted that they could decide the future of India without consulting us, Indians. After all, we are mere puppets in the hands of some higher force, and weaklings without the support of EDEN or Croatia.
This whole issue led to an in fighting within the govt., hidden from the view of the general public, between the moderates and extremists.
The former's concerns were finance, lack of external support from EDEN & Croatia(They had clarified earlier that their priority would be the independence of Greece and Albania) and a Weak Country.
The latter's idea was that the battle could be won even without the support of EDEN. In their opinion with the support of the friends & Mercenaries, and with the help of the cash bags lying in the Govt. coffers this battle of honor could be won.
Fortunately the extremists, as the name suggests, succeeded in convincing the govt. to give in to their demand after a lot of dissension.


(In the picture: Asmita trying to reach the collars of the extremists Xordin and Uv Ajed, as Navincharles tries to hold her back and the Hon'ble President Hemanathan looks on. Ishamael, deadley and Rebelash having a fistfight. Abhinay, Sumit and Prabal preparing for their examination. Alector trying to be diplomatic. Hamturk, Dinesh, Rakesh, rakr & Shockwavve trolling, laughing, pulling and throwing random punches. Anuj Jain trying to sing. The ladies WildQuark and Ashphalt looking totally clueless. Ashwamedh in his invisible self watching over the proceedings. And our chief M. Khurram doing what he does the best i.e. taking pictures of the chicks)

The war, later dubbed as The Coconut War was fought with the best effort from every Indian, friends of India and Mercenaries. The outcome to everyone's delight and a few people's dismay was the victory of India.

The first question:
What did we achieve by this war?

1. Respect & Honor: We won back what is rightfully ours. Kerala might not provide any economic benefit or resources to India at the moment. But the way the whole issue was dealt by Thais and Croatians, somehow sent a wrong message to the whole Plato's world, which had to be rectified at any cost and was done.

2. Activity: India had become a dead place to be in. There was little to no activity in the community barring a few noisy and loud ones off game over skype. This battle came as a boon in waking up those sleeping "Reeetttards", as her lady(or bot) WildQuark would have pronounced it. It also succeeded in evoking certain zombies, who had realized the ultimate truth of eLife through their steadfast observation in the concepts of nihilism, thus achieving a temporary nirvana.

3. Unity: The country which had been divided since past one month over certain issue involving a MU, saw itself unite into one strong entity in the face of an enemy and in the brink of war. Laying aside their past differences, the men and women of the country marched hand in hand into the battlefield with all their might and strength, and with a hope of a valiant victory.

4. True Patriot Medal: Though many would claim that TP medals could be won in any training wars involving India. But in my opinion what could have been more wonderful than to do the same with a cause in our heart.

5. Kerala: Last but not the least, we got back the god's own country. We got back the land of coconuts, houseboats, beautiful beaches and some pretty hills. A state which had been forcefully been taken away from us, and later become a part of some shady deal.


The Second question:
What did EDEN achieve by this war?
A wise old saying goes "The best way to weaken an enemy is by opening a second front to engage him in." And that is exactly what we did.
A 200 million damage that would have normally been dealt by us were converted to about a billion damage absorbed by us from our common enemies, which would have otherwise gone to some of our allies. So, yes we helped our allies by weakening our common enemies and we did it without an official support from EDEN, but with the support of our friends. And yes, there couldn't have been a better time than this to do it.
It would also be wrong to assume that we could have dealt a similar amount of damage for our allies. Honestly saying we couldn't have. But we did in our home battle because at stake were our Self respect, Dignity, Pride and Patriotism. Not to forget that our efforts were rewarded by several TP Medals during the campaign.
And in spite of all this, if few people still think of us to be selfish, they can continue doing the same.
For some of us the country comes before anything else, and what we did, in our view did more benefit to the country and EDEN, than the presumed harm.

The Final question:
What did we lose?
We lost about 400k CC. But what we gained is priceless and something that we can't afford every month or two.

To UAgg MU
It was a test for the whole nation, as much as it was for you guys. And some of you guys did exceedingly well in proving your loyalty to the country. I would personally like to request you guys to bury your hatchets(we already have buried ours) and invite you all to join us and our wonderful community on the IRC #India channel and of course our new found haven "Skype".

To the Thais & Serbs

Sorry but you can't have




or




neither can you guys have



nor




But what you guys can have is


The Pirated CDs and DVDs of Malayalam Cinema


And next time you guys decide to step a foot on Kerala as oppressors, not as tourists of course(kerala loves tourists), remember the face of these two cine idols


Mammootty and Mohanlal, the superstars of Malayalam Cinema: Watching, Waiting and Protecting their home state "Kerala"


Oh yeah and the most important thing of all!
Vote for the Young Iron lady of India, Ashphalt's party