[SEES] Domestic Study Concluded

Day 822, 14:40 • Published in USA USA • by S.E.E.S


In our last article, you saw science at work as we determined which countries were acceptable. This study was done on a global scale, but we didn't mention our domestic studies, and what we have found is shocking. We have learned much over the past weeks about how our domestic system works, and that is why we must declare war on Congress.

Now, before you start asking silly questions over our terrorist actions, we have just reason to declare war. Did you know that Congress has been selling babies to Col'u'mbia to pay for his drugs? Did you know that Congress has willingly refused to hand his virginity over to Dan Wang? Fact: Congress is a terrible person, and only we can stop him.

Chances are, if you are in Congress, you had no idea and your mind is blown so we lost you, or, you have known for the entire time and kept this information away from the Emerikans. Now, the two above examples are just the tip of the iceberg. We are withholding the rest of the actions for fear of having our article reported for vulgarity. With further review, we have found that these actions have been repeated over months, expanding all the way to the Gaius Julius administration.

Every month, Congress has had targets and every target has been publicly ruined, with his latest RAGE victim being Syrup. He requested Syrup be destroyed and gave him the order to quietly smuggle Zoli through our Maine border. Syrup was immediately found out after *evidence* was released and within minutes, his entire political career was ruined. It was all going to plan for Congress, until we found out. Now, we have a list of names that Congress has requested to be removed from sight, and the list is long. Here are some excerpts from the book:

4.) Emerick (Ruined his RL)
15.) Benn Dover (Came back)
22.) Chris Stanwick (Came back)
23.) Uncle Sam (Confessed)
38.) Ajay Bruno (Out of eUS)
45.) Joe DaSmoe (Plan still in the works)
50.) Syrup (Ruined)
(With the list going on full of names of citizens that don't even exist.)

SEES has spent weeks doing intense studies on just what has been killing the nation. All the evidence was there, but we needed to piece it together. So, after 72 long coffee driven hours of analyzing the data, it was something that both shocked and amazed us, but the result was expected. The analysis showed that Congress was the source of an overwhelming 80% of the nations faggotry. The other 20% being filled by Alee Ann. It is with this science that we can assert for a fact that Congress is the cancer killing the US.

Truth be told, recent stalking of the cancer that is Congress has one thing common amongst all of his minions. They all make routine visits to a factory off in Ghana, part of The Dark Continent.



A picture of what we believe to be Ghana by the name floating over the country.

This factory was discovered in 1969 and it sold high quality diamonds until the recent lack of war forced it to close. Now, activity in the factory skyrocketed, and we notice more and more people going into the factory, and all coming out, void of all joyous emotions. All this evidence points to Congress having been taking part in an underground scheme to brew boredom or better known as, in the language of the Dark Continent, Syndromo de Amuno Neferos or SANS. They are manufacturing large amounts of this SANS, enough to wipe out all the laughs and hopes of an entire nation. Strike teams have been deployed to the stockpile, but we're afraid enough damage has been done by the minor amounts of SANS already distributed.



Epic Beard Man was sent to Ghana where he is getting us the answers while the local kids bring amber lamps.


Forever Watching,

S.E.E.S.

Also, fascism is p cool