[NPG] If you can dodge a wrench, you can dodge a ball.

Day 1,615, 20:06 • Published in Canada South Africa • by Dr. James McCrimmon

Friends, eCanadians, Countrymen, lend me your ears for my cause.

I am announcing my run for congress in Alberta, under the epic banner of EPIC. Why am I running? No seriously, if I knew why am I asking you?

Well, as a congressman, I am asking you as I am representing the people. You, eCanadians, are the lifeblood of eCanada, without you, eCanada would just have a bunch of nothing inside it.

From what I have heard from you, great people, there are 3 things that are the main issues.

1. Activity in Congress.
This past month multiple forum votes have their deadline extended due to lack of congress votes, and even more congress members did not participate in Congressional Debates, which are key to developing our Country’s policy. I feel I am an active congress member, participating in all votes I was humanely able to, and participated in discussions that could shape the future of eCanada.

2. Militaristic State
As of this late congress session, we have seen our overseas colonies evaporate, and our very own Quebec and Newfoundland and Labrador have been taken for sample testing for ONE development. (Yet thanks to our Bromance with our Bros to the south, they flew in to our rescue.) Anywho, MU’s are key to our success at this game militarywise, and we need funding to be at a maximum that is fiscally avalible.

3. Player Integrity
A major problem in our society, is the integrity of players, and the integrity of voters. Some running for office choose to seek out those who wish to sell votes, while it has proven to be not illegal, it is considered by many to be unethical. If you ever are in need of tanks, or food, please don’t hesitate to talk to me, I have plenty of both. Don’t waste your vote on the highest bidder.


Tl;dr version
I will be active in Congress,
I support our troops,
I give free candy and moral advice to those in need,

Re-elect Congressman Nicholas Boyce in Alberta!
As a wise (or not so wise) man once said, “If you can dodge a wrench, you can dodge a ball!”

How it relates I am not sure.