[Hivernal4PotUS] Because Why Not?
Hivernal
On the campaign trail
There comes a time in all of our lives when a greater calling just seems to fall from the sky. I have found my greater calling, and I stand fully erect, and prepared to take on the highest office in this country.
Many of you may not know who I am. Those of you who once did, no longer do, as I have probably changed my name a good dozen times. But I can assure each and every one of you that I am the right man for the job. Not to mention the obvious experience I bring to the table.
You voted me in a lot more times than I would have
The eUnited States is in a rough position. We have been making significant gains in regards to the occupation, and I applaud the work the past administration has been performing. It is time to take it a step further, however, and with a man of my stature, connections, intellect, and generally awesomeness, there will be no better choice when the 5th comes around next month.
Super serious and ready to save the country
I will now lay out the plans for my term, and detail the exact specifics on why you should be voting for me:
1. My competitors in the race have freeing this country as critical issues in their platform. Some say they can do it much quicker than others. However, I can take it one step further. I will end the hostile occupation of our beloved states within my first 4 DAYS in office. How you might ask? Intelligence. My IQ exceeds that of normal people, and my understanding of international affairs is second to none. I have many plans that I have been laying for years. Waiting for this exact moment to spring them and restore these states.
2. Fill our coffers. We need money to build my golden palace. We are not taxing the people enough and it is about time I/the government gets their fair share. Upon winning the election, I will imediately advise Congress to vote on, and accept MAX taxes. I am extremely skilled in basic economics, and I even dabbled a little bit in intermediate economics. Why don't I have the job already?
3. Transparency and media growth. There seems to be a lot of animosity towards secret government negotiations and whatever else the plebeians of the country complain about. To placate you and kill two birds with one stone, I will publish all of my private messages. An article a day containing the messages of the day. None of these messages will be redacted, altered, or hidden in any way. I am not ashamed of the things I write. I have asked for nudes in the past, and I'll do it again. I won't let the job change who I am.
I'm all American, baby
4. The ULTRA American Lottery. Poor people shouldn't be allowed to handle the finances of this glorious country. Not only will I be paying myself and my staff a salary from the treasury, but I want to give you some money too. Every Friday during my term, I promise we will hold a national lottery, and the winner will receive a cool, 100% personally funded by me 100k CC reward.
I can afford it
My CC pocketbook may not look like much now, but I plan on adding another digit to it with that salary I was talking about. Awesomeness isn't free, jeez.
5. New players. New players are the lifeblood of this community, and I know just how important it is to educate and make them feel welcome. I promise to put into place a proper indoctrination program to brainwash all new players to vote for me in all future elections. They will worship my government and me as their proper overlords. They will become skilled in the art of eRepublik, and I will be able to effectively direct their every moves as I so please.
I care about our new players
Now, this is just my introductory article. I will probably make another release when we get closer to the election date announcing further plans for my term, as well as a cabinet to help me take over the country. I hope you will seriously consider this, and I encourage everyone to petition their party leader to nominate and vote for me. I AM the change that we want, the change that we need. Vote for me, I got you covered bros.
Because why not?
Just think about it
Comments
No money for the poor aside from an ultra lottery that will be equivalent to 1% of yours and your staffs income from the American tax. 200 IQ move right there. You have my vote!
It's the only way forward
You're a legend for this o7
I know what needs to be done. I can do it. Trust me.
good luck! 🙂
That's one vote secured
voted
vote me too pls https://www.erepublik.com/id/article/how-new-players-condition-nowday-2689610/1/20
Done
"Many of you may not know who I am. Those of you who once did, no longer do, as I have probably changed my name a good dozen times" ... ... ... ... ... Remind us? Make a list. Make it happen ...
I'm not even sure I remember them all
Then try the ones you do.
Lothair Carlovingian, Garrett Walker, Phokion, Amazarashi are ones off the top of my head...
This is high quality trolling. Next time mention the confederacy.
Trolling? This is a legitimate strong platform
It's not a whole lot different from one of the other candidates. I might even consider it slightly superior
Lol. I expected to see Trump pics in an article like this, not Elon Musk
We've gone beyond Trump here. A much better choice
o7
Best read in weeks. Thanks.
FULLY ENDORSED
I think our party has found its candidate.
We can make it happen
This Candidate is practically a self. lol
4 days seems like you aren’t trying as hard as you can.
Or is this part of your under promise over deliver strategy?
Good luck!
You already know too much. I have a few men who would like some words with you in this dark alley...
#LisaForDictator
There is a shiny, salary included, and pension filled cabinet seat calling your name
MAXIMUM SUPPORT
Meow!