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[GBM] Proteus Returns, Possibly Contagious

Day 2,324, 19:36 by Paul Proteus
Rumors of my death have been greatly exaggerated~


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Paul Proteus Sighted
Day 2,324, eUSA

According to recent reports, former American citizen, notorious eSwiss spy, and breakfast food enthusiast Paul Proteus has been sighted logging into eRepublik, shouting drunkenly in the streets and lurking on the local IRC. According to our source on the street, Cromstar: A disheveled Paul "appeared out of nowhere" and was "super creepy." Many other concerned citizens reported similar incidents as well.


Paul Proteus, shown above, is considered irrelevant and dangerous

Many of our readers will recognize Paul Proteus for something or other he did during his over four years of playing eRepublik, before disappearing suddenly late last year, though upon questioning, our expert on fictitious quotes Malarkey83 replied only with "Paul who? I'm confused, who are we talking about, do I know this guy?"

And as Paul Proteus, according to all reports, died some time ago, there is a very high possibility that the Proteus you meet today is zombie, whether or not he is interested in feeding on human brains remains to be seen.

While Paul Proteus was unavailable for comment, it seems more likely as time goes on that he has returned to eRepublik and will not be leaving for some time, and while his plans are uncertain, we would like to implement a Proteus "Red Alert", Proteus may be found online at any time, and is likely contagious.

As of last sighting, Paul was seen trying to pawn his medals and ranting about the impending death of his "RL".

In other news, I'm back. See you around~



Real article, or April's Fools, you'll find out next week on Cliffhangers!


Protip: I'm back

Your Moment of Zen:



That's it for today, see you around, I've made a huge mistake

Stay Sexy~


 

Comments

PigInZen
PigInZen Day 2,324, 19:40

Voted for the stats joke.

eShades
eShades Day 2,325, 20:05

HAHA, IT'S LIKE A GHOST BECAUSE, LIKE, PARANOR... & I also voted for the same reason. Amusing.

Jefferson Locke
Jefferson Locke Day 2,324, 19:41

Welcome back Paul!!!

anonymoushooligan
anonymoushooligan Day 2,324, 19:42

\o/

Aramec
Aramec Day 2,324, 19:44

Missed you boo~

Paul Proteus
Paul Proteus Day 2,324, 19:42

Missed you too~

LordRahl2
LordRahl2 Day 2,324, 19:46

WB

Tyler Bubblar
Tyler Bubblar Day 2,324, 19:47

Voted welcome back Paul

Dr. Walter Bishop
Dr. Walter Bishop Day 2,324, 20:09

We came together

Malarkey83
Malarkey83 Day 2,324, 20:42

Glad to see my quote was used...afraid it wouldn't make the article whoever you are.

WookyJack
WookyJack Day 2,324, 21:38

WB!

Cody Caine
Cody Caine Day 2,324, 22:05

Paul!

Phoenix Quinn
Phoenix Quinn Day 2,325, 03:15

How are things at Illium Industrial? All the machines working OK?

RaccoonGoon
RaccoonGoon Day 2,325, 09:49

Aww... Poor Paul's real life...

Welcome back nonetheless

bigcdizzle
bigcdizzle Day 2,325, 13:57

I missed you Paul

SColbert
SColbert Day 2,325, 14:12

Maryland sucks.

Talio Extremist
Talio Extremist Day 2,325, 17:49

Welcome Back!

saraht0ga
saraht0ga Day 2,325, 18:36

Who's Paul Proteus?

Paul Proteus
Paul Proteus Day 2,325, 19:47

Gnilraps
Gnilraps Day 2,325, 21:37

News is good news

Hekter
Hekter Day 2,326, 01:01

Get back in the cabinet.

Oblige
Oblige Day 2,326, 09:04

I've made a huge mistake.

David North
David North Day 2,326, 11:51

I want to catch the Proteus disease!!! Paul is pretty much a national hero in eSwitzerland!

P.S. He's eWilliam Tell, but that's a classified secret.

AccForSale Day 2,326, 14:38

Comment deleted

remi.remi
remi.remi Day 2,329, 11:41

ayyyyyyy

 
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You are reading an article written by a citizen of eRepublik, an immersive multiplayer strategy game based on real life countries. Create your own character and help your country achieve its glory while establishing yourself as a war hero, renowned publisher or finance guru.