[Deputy CP] We will fight them on the wossnames

Day 2,760, 06:51 • Published in United Kingdom United Kingdom • by Sir Humphrey Appleby

Citizens are rest assured the above castle is definitely not a kickback for the job…

Afternoon gents o7,

The slightly less catatonic of us may have noticed that, yet again, Belgium becomes our main focus - last term we helped defend them from an evil dual force of Japan and Montenegro, now it appears their new besiegers are none less than the nefarious nightmare state of Argentina. Early attempts to ‘pull a fast one’ in Flanders produced interesting results - whilst we were utterly hammered in campaign points the actual wall was fiercely contested, turning all divisions epic several times throughout the day.

We’re now faced with the unavoidable fact that our regions and bonuses are going to face extreme pressure as Belgium is wiped and the initiative of the war passes to our opponents. Those blessed with a fine sense of journalism will have noted in our financial reports that the treasury is still quite weak in proportion to how much the Argentinians will be pouring into COs. The few hundred grand of private money thrown in Flanders had very little effect and it seems spending the entire treasury on a battle wouldn’t do much to check their advance.

There’s no doubt we’re going to face a very tough campaign in the next few weeks against an old enemy over four times our size. They have made it a sort of tradition to try and wipe us every anniversary of the Falklands war as a revenge for decisively losing the rl fisticuff. Happily none of us particularly care (as we won) and I know a few of the lads are cracking open some of the finer vintages in celebration of the soon-to-be holiday to the below proposed eUK relocation:-



So while we probably lose our old homeland to hordes of ragtoe Argentinian militias, the government’s advice is to invest in a ship, adopt a scorched earth policy (only in Scotland) and to change the national animal to a Falklands penguin after several scotches on the way to our new promised islands…


Appleby
Deputy CP & MoF