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You are reading an article written by a citizen of eRepublik, an immersive multiplayer strategy game based on real life countries. Create your own character and help your country achieve its glory while establishing yourself as a war hero, renowned publisher or finance guru.

WHPR Pony Express

Day 1,407, 14:37 • Published in USA USA

• by James S. Brady Press Room

Greetings and Salutations, eAmericans...

'Tis I, Jude Connors; recently appointed by eUS Secretary of Media, Gnilraps; to return to be the dopest DoPE in eAmerican history. That's right, Folks... Jude Connors is once again Director of the Pony Express!

WHATEVER HAPPENED TO THE PONY EXPRESS?

A couple of things, really. The org went AWOL and the mighty and powerful Plato has been unsuccessful at returning it to our good nation. But after the upheaval we experienced yesterday, we have been shown exactly how un-omnipotent our smiter really is. But enough of that; introducing the NEW and IMPROVED...

THE PONY EXPRESS
by Jude Connors

CONGRESSIONAL ELECTION NEWS
As you know, elections for the 46th eUS Congress took place this past Sunday. Our very own Secretary of Media covered the results in his paper, 16 Shells.

eNPR: National Public Radio for the eUSA
eNPR is a relatively new program by the eAmerican government to combat the death of media in the New World. It is broadcast Mondays and Fridays and hosted by Civil Anarchy and Oblige.

Last night's program featured appearences by eAmerican President, Alexander_Auctoritas; Deputy Secretary of the Interior, jerseygirldani, former POTUS Cerb, USWP Dictator Henry Arundel, and yours truly. We spoke about the recent (again and again) skirmishes between the JCS militia and the eAmerican government, the recent Congress elections, and the ~bewbs 4 newbs~ program that feeds our hungry eAmerican youth. eNPR offers great information for ALL eAmericans and also offers lively social interaction. Make sure you tune in to eNPR every Monday and Friday night. Also remember that replays are available around the clock. For more information, subscribe to Civ's A Status Quo Exile.

~bewbs 4 newbs~

Had you been listening to eNPR last night, you would have heard JerseyGirl's sexy sexy voice talking about the b4n program. (If you missed it, you can click here to listen to the show. She comes in around the 21 minute mark!) THe program provides food for hungry eAmericans, much like the old Meals On WHeels program did. All you have to do is head over to the ~bewbs 4 newbs~ thread at the eUS Forums; post a sexy pic (NO NUDITY!!!), and get ready to receive food from the eUSA government.

It's that easy! For more information, Check out JG's paper, Genuinely Jersey.

Just incase you missed it, there are two causes for eAmerican celebration:

1. eRepublik's favorite Undead Hippie is Getting Hitched to Beea!

2. 42,654,2574 star general Pizza the Hut is PERMA-BANNED!