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Around the World in a Daze

FACT! -- Geography asks why things are as they are, where they are.


Hitchhikers! Strap up your backpacks, tighten your hiking shoes, grab your favorite shillelagh and let's get moving...



Explore the beauty of geography, an ancient practice that delves into the very nature of places. It's a discipline that encapsulates a multitude of characteristics and relationships, where the Greek words "geo" and "graphein" come together to form something akin to "earth writing."

In the enchanting words of Ptolemy, the 2nd-century BCE scholar, geography is the art of creating a vivid portrayal, a gallery of pictures, that encompasses the entirety of our known world and all the wonders it holds.

In essence, geography is the language of maps.

Today's geography seamlessly weaves together the threads of natural and social sciences, offering profound insights into the challenges of our modern world.

Join us on an exhilarating journey, led by our intrepid I.T. explorers, as we embark on a quest through the intricate maps of eRepublik. Together, we shall unravel the tapestry of this world, where borders and nations blur, and where the very essence of place and people is a wild, vibrant mosaic.

May you find fascination and delight in every country we encounter, and as you navigate through this travelogue, you may just be tempted to take a virtual step into a land you've never explored.

Should you choose to embark on this adventure, do share your discoveries with us! May your travels in this New World be filled with wonder, and may the ink of curiosity forever flow in your favor.

With warm regards,

The Inquisitive Minds at the International Tribune Editorial Guild






New World Map


FACT! -- The Mercator projection makes everything straight and parallel.




The Mercator projection, while undeniably biased, finds its place in our digital realm. In this e-world, simplicity reigns supreme. It is a world devoid of spherical nuances, devoid of curved horizons, where meridians do not weave us on our way through the cosmos.

In this realm, the curvature of the Earth goes unnoticed, along with other curve-balls. Most of the conflicts that envelop us are but friendly exchanges, akin to a game of ping-pong. A single global currency streamlines commerce, a mere button press away.

While a semblance of roundness exists, it is superficial. Our 'wars' are simulated, and in the grand theatre of this world, the economies fluctuate through algorithms beyond our comprehension. Resources flow, ensuring an absence of the poverty, starvation, and suffering that torment our tangible world. Here individuals can take on the curious role of 'self-employed managers,' an apt if convoluted term for the unconventional opportunities that abound.

This e-scape smooths the jagged edges of life's harsh realities.



Despite the multifaceted intricacies of this e-realm, its foundations are linear and orthogonal, as if meticulously aligned to a small set of 'Platonic' ideals.

The Mercator projection, infamous for its distortions along with its straight lines, inflates the prominence of Canada, Alaska, Russia, Greenland, and the Nordic nations, casting them as titans on the e-map. Meanwhile, it diminishes the southern continents, notably Africa, which, in the real world, stands as the second-largest landmass after Asia.

In our eRep Mercator project's world map, exclusively emphasizing political boundaries, Africa is rendered a blank canvas. For the game's universe, these vacant expanses might as well be non-existent. Conversely, the dense textual tapestry draped over Europe, especially Eastern Europe, hints at why some jestingly dub this realm 'The Balkan Wars.'







World Tour - Latin America!

FACT! -- "The world is becoming an immense military base, and that base is becoming a mental hospital the size of the world. Inside the nuthouse, which ones are crazy?" (Eduardo Galleano)



There are 73 countries in eRepublik so we won't be able to visit all of them in this issue. But you're all invited back next week to this locality to have a heapin' helpin' of I.T. hospitality. The best in journalism that is. For now, just set a spell, take your shoes off. Then y'all come back now, y'hear?


Today we provide the hitchhiker's guide to South and Central America.


Please keep in mind that this tour reflects a few particular moments in time in early Septmber 2023, around day 5770. Also that this is a silly browser game. Thanks.






Occupied Venezuela is a captivating tapestry of diverse influences. It's borders have evolved in dramatic and perplexing ways, leaving no space for national sovereignty. Some shifts are reminiscent of tiresome old colonial powers like USA, Portugal and Austria, while others bear the mark of 'nouveau-imperialistes' from the far reaches of Eastern Europe, such as Romania and Ukraine. Even the Gulf states, notably the UAE, have left their imprints on this proud nation.

But there's more to the story. Venezuela also finds itself in a peculiar embrace with its neighbor, Colombia, whose territorial aspirations seem to echo the ambitions of Bolivar himself, reaching westward, perhaps in a bid to recreate the grandeur of Bolivar's Gran Colombia.

As you navigate this geopolitical labyrinth, spare a thought for the people-players of Venezuela. They live at the crossroads of many shifting borders, where privilege and plight and politics intertwine in a dance that reflects the intricate history of this nation. Walk with us to explore the Venezuelan terrain, a land where the echoes of past dreams meet the aspirations of new ones.




If you've ever dreamed of visiting the original Uruguay, get ready to embrace the intriguing tale of its recent transformation. Picture this: the Lazarocrats, hailing from the distant lands of South Africa, have become the new overlords of this fascinating nation.

But that's not the whole story. In an astonishing twist, one-third of Uruguay's population has embarked on a journey across the seas to find their new home not in the expected destinations of Spain, Portugal, or Italy, but in the heart of Central Hungary. Even more peculiar, the remaining two-thirds have brought the rich Italianate Rioplatenese Spanish of Uruguay to new corners of the world – the bustling bazaars and serene villages of the once-Saudi provinces, Asir and Najran. Here, the captivating rhythm of 'candombe' is gaining ground, and a revival of the 2004 cinematic masterpiece 'Whiskey' is gracing the screens, now subtitled in Arabic.

Uruguay's narrative is one of unexpected twists and cultural crossroads, where traditions and languages intermingle in ways that defy expectations. Join us on a journey through this unique Uruguayan tapestry, where the echoes of South Africa meet the vibrancy of Central Hungary, and the charm of Rioplatenese Spanish finds a new home amidst the sands of Arabia.







From the majestic Andes to the lush Amazon rainforest, and the bustling urban warp and weave of Lima, embarking on a journey to Peru promises to immerse the e-traveler in the captivating diversity of this ancient land.

But here's where it gets interesting: once you secure a Peruvian visa, you unlock the door to unexpected adventures. Imagine engaging in spirited international ping-pong matches within the Peruvian enclave of Arkansas, nestled in North America. Here, you can savor some delectable fried catfish or hop on over to Brestskaya (formerly Belarus), where a steaming bowl of local 'zhurek' on a chilly winter evening is an absolute must-try.

Peru's national territory also hosts what appears to be 3 hotspots for the New World's favorite sporting event – ping-pong war, or maybe they're unique vacation rental opportunities. To be completely honest, our day took an unexpected turn with an extraordinary mid-day dinner in Lima, followed by a blissful siesta. Consequently, our knowledge of these occupied zones is, shall we say, a tad hazy. However, we've heard that these regions are now under the warm and easy-going supervision of Finns, Dutch, and Gulf Arabs. Or so we think. Rest assured, your visit to these areas should be just as delightful as the rest of your Peruvian adventure.




If you find yourself on a journey to the mystical plains of Chaco, the one realm in Paraguay where the locals still proudly reign, prepare to dust off your Guaraní. It's the national tongue, and it'll speed up your journey to savoring a sweet plate of mbaipy he-é and quenching your thirst with caña, all much faster than mere Spanish could ever hope to manage.

But, ah, should your travels lead you to the Paraguayan enclaves in the faraway land of Oklahoma, nestled somewhere in the remotest godforsaken reaches of the USA, or perhaps the mysterious heart of Middle Egypt – where even finding a bus ride can be an adventure (just ask my friend Stuart, who almost considered thumbing to Karnak) – then, my intrepid voyager, be prepared for a linguistic odyssey. Who knows what exotic dialects await in these far-flung corners of our globe? Fear not, for ping-pong is a universal language that transcends mere words, and you'll likely find a thrilling match with Oklahomans or Luxorians, even if verbal communication remains a mystery in those barbaric lands.

Geographically, half of Paraguay, but demographically, the lion's share of its population, finds itself under the watchful eyes of the Serbs. They converse in a tongue that may sound remarkably like Croatian but is graced with an alphabet that seems to belong to a parallel universe. Understanding them can be as elusive as their motives. Some say they're as sly as the Dutch, and there's no denying their martial spirit. Perhaps they were drawn by Paraguay's storied history of stirring the pot with its neighbors or its long tradition of, well, let's call it a 'distinctive' style of leadership. In any case, we can only imagine that time will tell what sort of a noble humanitarian quest they have embarked upon in Paraguay.




¡México, mi corazón! Within this diverse land, where conflicts and contrasts thrive, one truth shines through – the unbreakable unity of the Mexican people in the face of invaders and occupiers, a legendary testament to their resilience. For those venturing into the world of e-Mexico, the heart of this great nation beats proudly in five of its eight original regions, untouched by foreign hands.

Now, brace yourself for an interesting twist. As fate would have it, nations from the fiery cauldrons of the Baltics and the Balkans – specifically, North Macedonia, Lithuania, and Bulgaria – have taken root in the enchanting lands of Oaxaca and Veracruz. Visitors who revel in the thrill of resistance wars might just stumble upon some Zapatista activities in these regions. Or, who knows, perhaps they're crafting ping-pong tables for some friendly matches? It's a bit of a mystery. To be honest, I didn't have time to unravel it.


But let me share a personal anecdote that encapsulates the essence of Mexican hospitality. Once, I ventured into the mountains outside of Guadalajara to run an errand for a friend. Upon reaching the village where my friend was born, I met with the mayor, sorted out the paperwork, and expressed my gratitude. To my surprise, he insisted I stay for lunch, which, in local tradition, was dinner. I agreed, and soon, half the village had gathered. There was birria, pozole, jericalla, and, of course, tequila – oh, was there tequila!

Afterward, I rose to take my leave, but they protested, saying it was siesta time, and I must rest. So, I obliged and had a pleasant nap. Upon waking, I prepared to depart, but the mayor, ever so kind, pointed out that it would soon be dark, and the roads could be treacherous at night. He suggested I stay to rest up. And so, I did. The next morning, I returned to the city, having accomplished my mission. Alas, I hadn't the time nor the budget left to unravel the mystery of what those Euros were truly up to along the coasts.

If I were to hazard a guess, they might be helping to organize women's weaving collectives in Oaxaca or negotiating deals for high-quality steel pipes in Veracruz – you know, possibly for constructing new oil and gas pipelines that stretch through Turkey. But one thing's for sure, Mexico always has more surprises in store for those who stay a little longer.









Tourists stepping onto the enchanting island of e-Cuba are in for a treat as they immerse themselves in the vibrant dance of authentic e-Cuban culture, nestled in the unoccupied provinces of Western Cuba and Oriente. Here, it's customary to look people in the eye, show respect, and relish the warmth of personal connections that might seem a tad louder and closer than you're used to.

Don't hesitate to extend a friendly handshake – it's a gesture that often unlocks the true heart of Cuba. And for all you classic car aficionados, welcome to paradise, where the streets are lined with the timeless beauty of Studebakers, Pontiacs, Cadillacs, and Ford Fairlanes from the golden era of the 1950s.

But when the music beckons, and you find yourself swaying to the hypnotic rhythms of danzón, son, or mambo, consider a quick detour to Las Villas. These days, this province is under the cheerful occupation of Latvians, offering an opportunity for a spirited game of ping-pong amidst sunny Cuban surroundings.

And if your wanderlust leads you further, you can still bask in the heartwarming embrace of Cuban culture in their overseas territories, nestled in the quaint East Midlands, once part of the UK, or the captivating Abruzzo region in occupied Italia.

At first, you might find it slightly surreal to encounter billboards proclaiming the indomitable spirit of Che and Fidel as you venture into Hickling Pastures or Belper. Or, to savor a delectable plate of ropa vieja in a medieval hamlet amidst the picturesque mountain ranges of L'Aquila. But such delightful surprises are the hallmark of the New World, where every corner reveals an unexpected treasure.




To Arms! To Arms!

In the heart of the majestic Andes, the Land of the Poets, beloved Chile stands besieged. A formidable Romanian invasion force has swept across its cherished provinces, from Norte Grande to Zona Austral, subjecting its people to the tyranny of țuică in place of the beloved pisco sours. Even more unforgivable, they have dared to outlaw Terremoto, that exquisite blend of pipeño wine, pineapple ice-cream, pisco, and Fernet Branca, a concoction that is nothing short of pure ecstasy. They disparage it as 'liquid cotton candy' as if it were an insult, oh, the sacrilege!

The anguish is palpable.

But take heart, for the spirit of Chile is indomitable. From the arid deserts to the icy fjords, the heroic Chilean people shall rise once more. In this darkest hour, new poems shall be penned, and a New Song shall echo through the hallowed grounds of the Santiago Stadium. The resolve of the Chilean people-players is unbreakable, and the day of liberation draws nearer.






Brazil, the undisputed superpower of South America, stands as a true champion with four of its six original regions proudly retained. The occupied areas, however, have been leased out at eminently reasonable rates to e-Netherlanders and e-Israelis. Sensible as they are, these Dutch and Israeli guests haven't attempted to rewrite the playbook or change the culture of this vibrant nation. I mean, who would dare? It's Brazil! They blend in seamlessly, contribute to the rhythm of society, and pray that no eccentric zealot named Adolph will ever notice them.

Officially, Brazil may not be an empire, but they're not content with simply playing friendly matches in a few quaint villages near Nottingham or occupying an Italian region that barely registers on most tourist maps (hello, Cuba!). No, the mighty Brazilians have taken the world stage, occupying the likes of London itself, along with other major cities worldwide, such as New Orleans, Lviv, Plovdiv, and Trondheim. They've even ventured into regions in Europe and Asia — Marche in Italy, Southern Bessarabia in Moldova, West Bengal in India, and Kalimantan in Indonesia.

The world situation as seen from Brazil is beginning to look less like a passion for ping-pong and more like Brazilian football — recall that this is the country with more World Cup wins than any other, and the only team to grace every World Cup competition in history. Perhaps the day is nearing when you won't have to travel very far to find yourself standing on Brazilian territory — a moment that promises to be as electrifying as a World Cup final.

Let the roar of the crowd resound!




Alas! These are dire times for La Albiceleste as they navigate the treacherous waters of the eRep World Wars.

The ruthless Bulgarian Legions stormed through every province, attempting to persuade Argentines to swap their cherished revuelto de gramajo for breakfast banitsa. Needless to say, this culinary conversion has been met with icy stares, disapproving gestures, and a string of colorful expletives that our intrepid correspondent, dodging bullets in the embattled streets of Buenos Aires, has loosely translated as, "For Pete's sake, can't you folks at least use a normal alphabet?!"

In a display of noble generosity, the Slovaks extended an invitation to the beleaguered Argentines, offering refuge in Western Slovakia. Regrettably, the remaining Slovakian regions were promptly devoured by other "visitors," leaving no room for Slovaks to call home. On the brighter side, Bratislava now boasts thriving tango studios and serves up yerba mate at every corner.




Oh, weep for Bolivia! Sliced up like a pork roast by the neo-imperialists of the New World, each one greedily taking their share — Bulgarian Bolivia, Romanian Bolivia, Colombian Bolivia, Macedonian Bolivia, and Italian Bolivia.

With its rich RL history of indigenismo, militant socialism, feminism, anarchism, nationalism, indianismo, and anti-gringo revolt, one can only hope that someday the scales will tip, and Bolivia will proudly rise once more among the nations of eRepublik.






Comment, Endorse, Win Prizes!
An I.T. Lotto will be held prior to publication of the next edition. One winner will be randomly selected from among those who endorse this artcle, another from among those who comment!


Winners!
Winners from last week are...

The Tasty Endorse Mint Prize of 5,000cc goes to Roger the Shrubber.
The Extraordinary Commentary Luminary Prize of 5,000cc goes to PimpDollaz.




Next time: Africa and Asia!