Join the new world

Good evening, London. Allow me first to apologize for this interruption. I do, like many of you, appreciate the comforts of every day routine- the security of the familiar, the tranquility of repetition. I enjoy them as much as any bloke. But in the spirit of commemoration, thereby those important events of the past usually associated with someone's death or the end of some awful bloody struggle, a celebration of a nice holiday, I thought we could mark this December the 5th, a day that is sadly no longer remembered, by taking some time out of our daily lives to sit down and have a little chat. There are of course those who do not want us to speak.. Why? Because while the truncheon may be used in lieu of conversation, words will always retain their power. Words offer the means to meaning, and for those who will listen, the enunciation of truth. And the truth is, there is something still terribly wrong with this country, isn't there? Cruelty and injustice, intolerance and oppression. And where once you had the freedom to object, to think and speak as you saw fit, you now have censors and systems of surveillance coercing your conformity and soliciting your submission. How did this happen? Who's to blame? Well certainly there are those more responsible than others, and they will be held accountable, but again truth be told, if you're looking for the guilty, you need only look into a mirror. I know why you did it. I know you were afraid. Who wouldn't be? War, terror, disease. There were a myriad of problems which conspired to corrupt your reason and rob you of your common sense. Fear got the best of you, and in your panic you turned to the ex high chancellor, GLaDOS. He promised you order, he promised you peace, and all he demanded in return was your silent, obedient consent.

On the eve of our elections I feel as though this country needs a short sharp shock. I feel Mr Woldy has been a fantastic servant of the eUK, and that every member of the country should applaud his fantastic efforts. Now before you let your imaginations run away with you, I am in no way in support of any one party - there are always improvements that need making, but for now I am a TUPer, because of the way in which the PM has this country.

What, you might well ask is the point of examining this great land and finding it wanting? My answer dear friends, is that the country is only just recovering from the mess that our previous adjudicant left us in. Woldy has not only shown character, humour and charm ( Enough to get any Peter Sellers Fan elected!), but backed up his work with success after success.

RE-ELECT HIM!

Woldy has guided us through these last months with skill and shown that he has learnt from his experiences and is putting this knowledge to good effect!

Lest we return to the terror of the past, which would happen again if Mr Rossiter gets into office, let us unite as one behind Woldy.

People should not be afraid of their governments. Governments should be afraid of their people.