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For some time political commentators considered the Australian Communist Party finished.

After falling from the Top 5 as a consequence of the rise of the PaPP, people wrote off the Communist Party for good. They said we were finished. Done for. Ended. Failed. Insignificant.

Beards were shaved, hammers and sickles were returned to workshops and people no longer punished Bill Gates by throwing bricks through Windows. Crowds of people stood around, with hands in pockets, looking sad and disappointed. Many believed the hype and predictions of our detractors. Many believed it was the end.

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How wrong they were.

We have reformed and we have organised. We have eyes and ears on every street corner, in every major city around the country.

Discreet photos have been taken. Names have been collected and movements recorded. Weapons and spray-on beards, long hoarded in basements, are now being distributed to revolutionaries who stayed awake until the early hours of the morning, whittling their fingers to the bone, bottling molotovs. Meetings formerly conducted in abandoned warehouses are now taking place in public. Hushed conversations in coffee shops where we once we plotted our devious plots have grown in volume and deviousness.

And today, a red sun dawned over the continent. The Australian Communist Party returned to the Top 5.

As of now there is chaos in the streets.

Pelted with rocks and bricks, police have lost control of the streets in fierce clashes with bearded crowds across the country. Tear gas supplies have been exhausted and officers in riot gear have taken refuge in government buildings. People are reclaiming property from big businesses in a flurry of facial hair. Roads have been torn up and luxury cars have been overturned to form barricades. Entire neighbourhoods have risen up after workers ejected their employers from their workplaces. Black and red flags have been hung from windows everywhere.

Angry crowds have raided police stations and freed prisoners from their cells. Radical graffiti has been scrawled over bank windows and on walls around the country. Molotov cocktails were hurled into lobbies of luxury hotels and CCTV cameras have been smashed into oblivion.

We are back, bearded and once again working to make the rich and powerful nervous.

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