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Creating an eCanadian Lulzempire

eCanada needs win, eCanadians need lulz, and all of our egos together demand a magnificent lulzempire. Myself and TemujinBC will ensure that this gets done.

What do we mean by this? The fact that we are running our platform on two key ideas:

1. More war and sustainable conquest
2. Lulz & Roleplay. Lots of it.

Think about it for a second, what does eCanada need most? We're bored out of our damn minds, and every time we push forward with great ambition into the eUK and take their precious cow farms away from them and loot the Queen's Palace, we usually get pushed right back in less than a few days. Yes we get some lulz out of it, but we never get that satisfaction from seeing them toiling in the cow fields day in and day out, softly muttering annoying slander in British accents. We never feel LIKE A BOSS over someone's turf.





We need more war. And not just random SHOOT ERBODY' type of war, we need sustainable conquest. We need a damn empire. Now given our size, our strength, and our monies, we probably can't rule half the eWorld as subliminally noted in our Constitution, so I'm not saying here that we should declare war on the Serbian motherland, but what I am saying is that we can take a few extra territories each month, and hold them. Yes, that's right, I want eCanada to do what it has never in it's history done, hold foreign territories (not acquired through peaceful land swaps) for over one month.

How do we plan to achieve all this?

1. Most if not ALL of discretionary spending (meaning all non-mandatory spending on things like Mutual Protection Pacts) will be directed to Military Units (MUs).

2. Spending on MUs will be paid out in equal amounts to each MU based on certain criteria such as numbers of soldiers, damage dealt, etc.

3. The President, the Vice President, the Minister of Defense, and all other necessary advisers will convene to plan a military strategy to ensure that eCanada is able to commit to a sustainable conquest campaign. This means that we must takeover regions that we can hold with the current influx of cash that we have, not with the unsustainable cash savings that take months to build. Savings give a false impression of having more power than you actually do. The main question that will need to be addressed is: when the savings run out, will we be able to hold on to the territories we capture? Once we have all the details finalized (a rough draft is already in process of being finished), the plan will then be presented to congress to be ratified into LAW. The only way is forward is to keep going.



4. In order to secure resources for war, friendly and mutually beneficial land-swaps will the eUS and other nations will be arranged by the President, Vice President, Minister of Foreign Affairs, and the Minister of Finance. We may also require land-swaps with nations in order to create the necessary pathway needed to begin our assault on foreign territory.

5. During the "peace before the storm" period, stockpiles of cash and weapons will be gathered in order to squander any uprisings in foreign lands and for use in the initial strike. Savings, as explained in point #3, will not be calculated in determining our ability to hold foreign territories, but used rather to deplete any stockpiles the enemy nation may have during the initial strike, and as an emergency fund against crazy credit-card-infused tanks.





We also want eCanadians to enjoy themselves. It's that simple. That's why we will help launch some of the greatest social campaigns the likes of which have not been seen since the days of Adam Sutler (all hail). We're talking here of systematicallysetting up groups to go trolling our enemies in lulzsqadrons, we're talking about encouraging class A journalism from the times of Zanlan (died circa. Day 500), and we're talking about fun games & contests, secret spais trolling foreign forums, and everything from competitions between MUs to a better functioning new player mentoring system. We're talking about ALL DAT, and way more. How much you say? As much as our imagination will let us. The Minister of Internal affairs and whoever else volunteers will have a free hand with how much stuff we can come up with. We will also take a hard stance against crime and corruption and the abuse of eCanadian society by people such as Rolo who have stolen from the treasury while in power. The point is to create involvement and a fun atmosphere for not only current players, but new players as well. eCanada has demand MOAR lulz and MOAR integrity in government for a very long time now. We will obey that demand.

How do we plan to achieve all this?

1. The President, Vice President, and the Minister of Internal Affairs will undertake the tremendous task of bringing great amounts of lulz to the nation. This will be done by creating a number of sub-departments such as the Dept. of Information (government spokesperson), the CSIS (secret spai services), the Dept. of Foreign Demoralization & Psychological Warfare (jointly managed with the Minister of Defense), the Dept. of Lulz (tasked with organizing games, competitions and the like), The Dept. of New Player Affairs, The Dept. of Justice, and the Dept. of WhateverElseWeComeUpWith.

2. Government transparency will be increased through constant updates relayed through the Dept. of Information. Updates will include that of Congress activity as well as Executive activity. Roleplay will be encouraged in government through the Dept. of Justice, and Dept. of Lulz, through encouraging citizens to become more active journalists.

3. Bringing greater integrity and sound leadership to government with the help of the Justice Dept. and the CSIS. Crime and corruption have a demoralizing effect on the population and will not be tolerated. Players like Rolo who have stolen literally thousands of gold from the eCanadian Treasury will be given no leniency. A point must be made that you do not f*** around with the property and integrity of the eCanadian people.



To Conclude

Overall we plan to not just change eCanada, but to unlock it's vast potential of win. Hopefully the message and principles that we bring are in tune with your aspirations as well.

If you choose to throw your generous support behind our campaign to create an eCanadian Lulzempire, please let us know through PM. We'd be very grateful to any who wish to volunteer for our campaign. 🙂

Thanks for reading. And good luck to all other (non-Rolo affiliated) candidates out there!

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Stay tuned for Part 2 of the Proposed Cabinet. If you didn't catch part one, click here to read it. Cheers!