What I Think Of You People

Day 3,357, 02:59 Published in USA USA by Azazel Romanov


That's right.

I have awoken from my slumber.

And I have an important message for some of you.

Dear Ilene,

Your message is vague and terrible. You want new blood? You want to improve your party's image? Cute. This isn't different from any vague Presidential promise. It isn't going to win you any endorsement outside of the SFP, and it certainly isn't going to win you the election. Several have tried before you to limited success. But you can use it as a platform. Here's a quote:

"SFP’ers as I know them are not unpatriotic, dangerous to national security or special children in any sense of the word. We are non-conformists though, who oppose the argument from authority wherever and whenever it appears. If you take the time to get to know us properly, you’ll find some of the most generous, kindhearted and caring people inside this place we call the New World."

Prove this. Don't make us take the time, show us now what you know. Tell us why you oppose the authority argument. Tell us what we should know about the SFP that we are missing. You aren't going to convince a lot of people with the argument you have presented thus far, but I think you can present an argument that some people will listen to. You can be the messenger, or you could be another footnote.

Also, being President of Australia is not like being President of the United States. Representing SFP is not like representing the United States. You will wield much more power and influence. Figure out what you would do with it.

Dear Senryaku,

I feel like you understand the apathy that has overtaken the game, and I do hope that you elaborate on such and how we should fix this issue. Because if you don't, you will end up like every other President, including myself, who has including apathy in their platform and failed to address it in a meaningful way. The reason for this is that apathy is for the game itself, not the country. Pick a different course, promise to make the month for the country more interesting to reengage people currently playing. You won't bring people back, you won't bring new people in, but just maybe you can keep the people you have and increase their involvement. Impress me.

You are supposed to be the wild card. You are supposed to be the unpredictable candidate. You think outside the box and provide answers the others are unwilling to pursue or entertain. Give us that. Show me that you can be what we don't expect, because I think this game needs that more than ever.

Show me that creativity still exists. That this game is still capable of supporting organic ideas that we have rejected out of hand or neglected to seek. I've seen you in action before and I think that ideas that you present, if not implemented by you as President, could at the very least improve the way we govern.

Dear Derphoof,

I have wanted you to be President forever. I have always thought that you would be a great one, and I always thought that you would fit the mold that Wild Owl or I created. You learned and experienced foreign policy alongside many Presidents who embraced the worldview we sought to create. But I am glad that you seek to reject what we all stood for. I appreciate that you seek to shake what we have created and maintained for years. In fact, I think the only way for you to be a successful President is to reject everything that we stood for.

But you have to prove that we are ready for such a change. You have to explain to Americans that losing on the scale we saw in 2013 is worth the risk. You have to take risks that people are going to ridicule you for. That people will say are foolish endeavors.

So far I see you as the establishment candidate. I hate that. I hate that because I feel like you would be most likely to be the same as everything we have already seen. I say this with the thought that you are most likely to win. And I hope that you are willing to shake the foundations should you prevail.




I am glad to see a competitive election. You are all new candidates or at least will be new Presidents. You have the opportunity to craft a new message that we can follow. I don't want to be disappointed again. I have all but quit the game to focus on real life, or better uses of my free time.

So here's the challenge: What can you offer that would make me come back? What could you do that would be different from countless others? Why should I care what you will do to get a medal?


For another time,

Official, Fully Accredited, 100% Legit, First, Last Vice President of the United States