Another Jerk Running for Congress

Day 797, 02:48 • Published in Canada Canada • by Rylde

Its that time of the month again Citizens. Lets vote in a bunch of jerks to help run this ship we call eCanada. If you only vote for one jerk this month make sure its the jerk most love to hate. I'm taking another crack at NB this month. I failed once before when I first started my politcal path of self destruction.


My Political Mascot. I named him Scorpius.

I'm running in the NB this month because I found Saskahole quite boring and flat like all there woman. I'm not the man for the job and I won't do much for productivity in Congress. I'm pretty useless in there to be honest. I have some fun pushing my limits and seeing what I can get away with.
Don't let my congress banning of the last week of my term deter you from making a mistake by voting for me. Once i'm back in I'll go back to my coin flipping ways of voting congress motions. Trying my best to entertain you my loyal supporters who deserves laughs instead of boring congress melodrama.

This months candidates for all the provinces are a making the media pretty damn boring. Atleast they stopped promising crap. I think i kinda had a thing to do with it personally with my brutal honesty. I am taking credit. Congress media spam blows.

Rylde's Platform

-I will not better my province
-I will not go to congress meetings sober
-Though shall not agree with filthy politicians
-I will get banned again from congress
-I will not respect my fellow congressman
-I support a military dictatorship run by Bruck
-Citizens of this country should not have a voice and be drones respecting all I do and say.
-I hate platforms and all should be written in this style
-I'll shoot you edead if you disagree with me
-To accpet the 5 gold for getting elected


Personal hero of mine maybe you heard of him. He knew how to get Sh@t done.

I have nothing to offer to New brunswick besides my comedy and attitude. I wanted to help alot of newbs get off that rock like 4 months ago. Unfortunately the 2nd coming of Hitler worked them to death in his work camps building a hospital no less.

NB pride has killed more people than those that fell over dead listening to Jacobi's speeches. Scorpius only wishes he could get that many confirmed kills and octavian wants to bring them back to life for his revolution that will never happen.

if you enjoy working for little pay with no medical facilities move to New brunswick. We can offer you quick advancement as those above you have the bad habit of F@*%ing dying on us. If you don't like a slow death then as a future congressman of NB I can offer you a gun or a rope to off yourself nice and quick like.
I would prefer you use the rope so i can watch you dangle and see what you ate the day before. Everytime a NBer dies it means the province in one step closer to a hospital.


NB Pride's dedicated workforce ready for another shift.

A vote for Rylde is a vote for a jerk who doesn't like or respect you unless you shoot people as a member of the CC. The rest of you can rot in your personal soap opera's.


I said I'd shoot you if you disagreed with me