The Blue Hill Horror

Day 4,324, 10:03 • Published in Bosnia and Herzegovina Iran • by the angel

Hype:
Around September 17, 2009, four adolescents playing in Cerro Azul, Panama, claimed they saw the rubbery E.T. look-alike run out of a cave. According to them, it started chasing them, so they threw rocks at it until it was dead (yay humanity!) They then pushed its body into the water.

The UK tabloids called it Gollum (the creature from the Lord of the Rings) because it was living in a cave, while other papers just gave it the name "The Blue Hill Horror" because that'll make a better original SyFy movie title than "That Thing That Looks Like If E.T. and Gollum From Lord of the Rings Had a Baby Somehow."

Reality:
Scientists found that the adolescents' tale was false because the sloth had been decomposing before that day. Its long decomposition in the river had removed its hair and given it its bloated and rubbery skin. It was a dead sloth, which now makes this sad instead of mysterious and awesome.