[Sluagh] Election Autopsy: ILP

Day 3,317, 14:02 • Published in Ireland South Africa • by Dante Boss

Citizens of eIreland,

The past few days has seen a major overhaul in one of eIrelands longest standing institutions, The Independent Labour Party. The long standing Party President Winston Hopeless Smith was removed in one the most most hotly fought elections in possibly eHistory.

A young, noble politician by the name of MR. HANK SCORPIO rose from the ranks of the gulags with an army of true comrades.These brave warriors from the depths of poverty rose from the sewers of ILP HQ in mass numbers and took the fight to a man corrupted by power. These proletariat's knew that death was a possibility, they knew that their lives were at risk and should the great Giant of Irishbhoy allow them the ascent to the heavens above, their wives and infants would pay the price of their humbled actions.

MR. HANK SCORPIO proved to be more than just a revolutionary, he proved to be a Messiah, a gift blessed upon him from the Greats above us. Words can't describe the miracle which unfolded on a day that I will always remember as one of Holy Miracles. For those who are unaware of what I may be referring to, the magician in question has the ability to reverse the effects of death. On the day of the election, the ground of eIrish graveyards was ripped open and soldiers of fortune emerged bearing flags of revolution and justice.

The new leader of the ILP has uncovered years of corruption and scandal that went on from the 23rd Floor of the ILP HQ. He has presented his findings in his latest article which can be read here.

Outed leader Winston Hopeless Smith has vowed the election illegitimate, a true denial of the democracy which he speaks so fondly of. The level of denial in this corrupted man has become more and more evident over the previous year as he has not accepted the result of any Presidential election which provides every citizen a platform to make change. Instead he claims that he and his now defunct "Leadership Council" are the true faces of reason and honesty upon our shores.

A claim which every man and/or woman can dismiss upon looking at the facts presented. His once loyal henchmen and the people he represents are nothing but voting drones or inactive citizens of our nation, something which tells me that the party had lost it's way entirely. The revolution which has taken place aims to reverse the damage inflicted by a detached corrupted political institution and hopefully install true change and progress.



Let's look at the evidence behind the faltering party.

Liam Tatlock:Logs in only on election days to cast his vote. Not a true member of eIrish society as he appears to be nothing short of a voting drone.




Uncle Bulgaria: Logs in only on election days to cast his vote. Not a true member of eIrish society as he appears to be nothing short of a voting drone.





Tara C: just shy of 50% her logins are for voting days. A step up from a voting drone who isn't a fully active member of our community.






Gallifreyan: Logs in only on election days to cast his vote. Not a true member of eIrish society as he appears to be nothing short of a voting drone.





CFL34: Not active.





BBBQX11: Not Active.





Cormaic Art: Not Active.






Among these shocking figures we can reveal the suspicious deaths of other notable ILP characters who surrounded the questionable WHS.

SycoASL
Grumpy99
Noobstar
loftedraptor
Raven Anarcho
Lougheoin



Doesn't look like the institution was running smoothly at all to me. As Dictator of eIreland, I wish MR. HANK SCORPIO best of luck in restoring justice to what was once branded as the honest party of eIreland.

Regards,
Sluagh.