[CP] Day 1 - Your problem

Day 4,278, 06:39 • Published in United Kingdom United Kingdom • by 10 Downing Street



Good afternoon gents o/,

Seems appropriate to have one of our sh****** CPs back to lead us out of an equally s*** situation…

Cheers to the 54% of us who were sane enough to vote for one of the other candidates! Commiserations especially to Ludgate who will now have to wait patiently for mongress to fire up our celebrated impeachment process (again).

I’m also delighted to announce enough power for 3 hospitals as we successfully start harvesting the energy of jamesw violently turning in his grave…

Whilst you're here - please vote up Chaz's takeover of Canada


The first week

For those of you prepared to believe it: we inherit a bright and happy situation. Please ignore the rest.

Unfortunately it’s no secret that every ministry outside of the bank has died. This has led to the rather dangerous situation where foreign policy has either been limited to the old mates network or else non-existent.

Thanks to past friendly relations we’ve unofficial agreements with Turkey and Chile on the return of our taxes. If you have a quick look at the recent BoE report this represents only a small portion of the ~£600k lost overall.

I expect the chances of even being listened to by the Don’t Cry For Mes as rather remote, but we may have more luck with some of the others. Realistically outside of going cap in hand for our taxes back there’s not much chance of owt else I’m afraid - they will be pushing for us to sign a treaty to ‘legitimise’ these enforced TWs and we will have to carry on resisting this.

These unequal treaties are hard to get out of and simply sends a message to our allies that we’ve given up. Sure; the situation remains relatively unchanged with Asteria firmly on the back foot and I honestly doubt this will change overmonth.

But for us to be remotely worth liberating we will have to carry on in quiet desperation for a while longer, and demonstrate we are worth the effort of saving.

This will require us to pretend to get our act together and earn a few brownie points to eventually cash in on. And the best way to do that is to dig up the MoD.

Whilst we don’t have to like these enforced TWs we can at least coordinate our side to get a larger share of the medals coming out of it. But we also need to make sure we’re not p****** away our damage for the benefit of our occupiers when our allies urgently require it instead. It follows if we’re not doing our bit in their efforts then why should they do so for us?

Traditionally this ministry has always been an absolute nightmare to keep alive - if you could keep an eye on the national feed and on our lovely ingame spam it makes it a bit easier. It’s been a while since we came out in (tiny) force, and, even if we barely hit anything, it would at least be entertaining to see again…

I apologise for the verbal diarrhea that is this opening article - should have a pm with clearer goals for the first week soon.

Cheers o/,


Appleby