[CP] A Rock and a Hard Place

Day 1,640, 05:54 • Published in Canada Canada • by Sperry

What a day! Taking another step down the devolutionary scale which is my sleep, this morning I found myself on the floor near my computer. Turns out I fell asleep while trying to take a nap (don’t question this), and never quite made it to my bed. Or even my usual pass-out chair. I am thinking I can cut down on furniture, since I’ve discovered the carpet is comfy enough. Who’da thunk?



London Bridge

London is an infamous region to Canadians. It represents the long-unattainable last hold of the British, the region that - until 6 months ago - could not be taken. Canada has struggled to reach it and has struggled to hold on to it. The Brits, after all, are fond of London. But the latest battle for London was different. This battle - which saw massive amounts of damage from just about every TEDEN/ONE country - was the climax to our easiest invasion of Britain ever.

After 3 weeks of winning every region except for the Normandy Resistance, we slammed up against Appleby’s men at London. Here’s where things got tricky. Appleby is a self-proclaimed domestic. He focuses on their Ministry of Health and Morale Regions, for the mostpart. As a result, when I (a non-domestic) came for London to end the war, the answer was “No.” Appleby’s country is in the middle of a baby boom. Like most baby booms, many are dying, so he’s doing his best to give them a reason to stay. Not losing your country kinda helps morale.

Appleby knows I want this war to close. Winning London was the fastest way to do that. And so London swiftly became the region to fight in yesterday. Terra and EDEN both sent very strong backup. ONE (plus Bulgaria) pounded the wall the other way. Just how hard were we hitting to keep London? Take a look at Eric Last’s name on this list. 25 Million Damage for Canada. Alfagrem, the former Brit (who they repeatedly succeed in isolating), laid down another 20 million for us.

We’ve taken London. By the end of the battle, we had delayed East of England long enough to close our borders and Natural Enemy. And, for just over an hour, we sat pretty at 22 regions within Canada’s borders. What’s that like internationally? Poland has 22 regions. Food for thought.


The Reality of Britain

Many of you are wondering what are plans are with Britain. Are we going to re-declare our NE? Are we going to hold them in the dirt for as long as possible? Are we going to make sure their treaty with Ireland fails? To all 3 of these; No. Simply put, we have better and more important things to be doing as a nation than derping around in Britain for the rest of our lives. This is a war that has been done, redone, done over, and done again for the past 3 years. There is nothing original or inspirational about beating the British, because we’ve beaten them (and they’ve beaten us) so many times that nobody even bothers to keep track anymore.

I have been very open with Appleby about my desire to close this war as soon as possible. Yesterday we achieved that - TEDEN forces ended the war, despite ONE and Appleby’s strong desire to keep this war going ad nauseum. I have no interest in ignoring TEDEN battles to beat down stupid resistances in regions that generally don’t matter to us. It’s a waste of time and will not be happening.

What of South East England, our current priority? Easy. Appleby and his government agreed to stay away from that region. It benefits Canada to have access to South East, for about 6 different reasons that are fairly complicated for a region that supplies cows. And so you can imagine my frustration at seeing the very first Resistance from Britain arrive in South East. The one region we agreed Britain would postpone.

What was Appleby’s response? “I cannot lead in my sleep.” Sweet, fair enough, but when you’ve just spent 3 weeks getting kicked in the teeth, I’d expect a little bit more of an answer than “whoopsie.” If Britain cannot control its own citizens, flouting agreements wherever it whims, it should hardly expect an easy return to the map. Honour your word and get out of that region.


The Belgian Fiasco

*Sperry proposes and Belgian War and orders Congress to support it*
*SHTF*
*Sperry orders Congress to shoot down the proposal, and they do so*
*Cooler Heads Prevail*

That is the grand tl;dr of what happened for most of the day yesterday. After successfully closing the British war, we were in a position to move on to new and entertaining things. With our Sexy War still in the works and some conversations on that still needing to happen, Canada was looking for action. Right next door appears little Belgium, back from the map after causing the Netherlands some frustration, without any allies and with some very attractive fruit.

After setting our ducks in a row and moving on the NE, I asked Congress to approve the war, and they quickly moved to do so. And then a ducky fell out of the row. In the process of preparing for this sideshow, a few miscommunications happened between Canada and some of her allies, and a few people were very concerned that there would be major complications from what was, ultimately, a bed & breakfast visit for waffles.

Belgium is a new nation to attack. To my knowledge it’s only been acted on once before (by Addy). And as much as there are considerable benefits to sweeping through Belgium and setting up camp there, we don’t want to be the kind of country that attacks Belgium and causes international incidents over it (tehehe, RL reference get). And so, very deliberately, we have shot down the proposal for today. This has repaired the miscommunications of yesterday and demonstrated that Canada has an active interest in supporting all of our allies, not just 1 or 2.

This does not mean that Belgium’s waffles are beyond our reach, nor does it mean that we will not return. But, again, Belgium is not in our Prime Directive. We’ve got better things to hunt - long term - than chocolate and fruit. If Belgium still fits into our timeline and we hold South East (hm, Appleby?), then we will very likely return. If the border closes or the Sexy War’s arrival is imminent, we will of course focus on that entirely.

This is a game. It’s an Internet game that, for most of us (the sane ones, at any rate), has no financial impact on our lives. And so we are most successful, and indeed least damaged as a nation, when we address these issues calmly and quickly. Canada has done so. In the moments following the snafu, Eric, Plugson and I spoke with all of Congress and Cabinet, Terra and EDEN commanders, member nations of both alliances, specific international allies, and the leaders of Belgium and Britain. What began as a missed memo has been isolated and addressed, so that Canada can once again move on to better and more entertaining things.

Today, EDEN will be meeting to discuss some important but unrelated issues. No doubt we’ll have a chance to make sure all is well with the Belgian Burp, and then strike out once more in collaboration with our allies. Until then, Canada, I need to move my bed closer.