Some funny quotes

Day 1,442, 03:42 • Published in Poland Brazil • by JACK PARROT

* If 4 out of 5 people SUFFER from diarrhea... does that mean that one enjoys it?

* If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of payments.

* A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where a train stops. On my desk, I have a work station..

* Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience.

* I asked God for a bike, but I know God doesn't work that way. So I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness.

* Sex is not the answer. Sex is the question. "Yes" is the answer.

* We live in a society where pizza gets to your house before the police.

* Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.

* We never really grow up, we only learn how to act in public.
Children: You spend the first 2 years of their life teaching them to walk and talk. Then you spend the next 16 years telling them to sit down and shut-up.

* Politicians and diapers have one thing in common. They should both be changed regularly, and for the same reason.

* My mother never saw the irony in calling me a son-of-a-bitch.

* God must love stupid people. He made SO many.