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It's not sausages ill tell you that much



MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! As thunder crackles in the background the evil laugh carries on into the storm. It was another dark and gloomy day on the hills of Serbia. There was nothing but banned dead multis and expired Visa Mastercards surrounding the land. On the top of the tower a rotting dairy smell was present. It was none other then PASTA THE HUT!



"Why won't anyone love me?" Pasta the Hut cried to his self as he slowly sliced the razor blade down his little baby sized noodle. "Im the hardest working noodle but I always end up being the softest in the bowl" he bawled. "It can't be my selfish attitude or my manipulative dishonest ways.. It has to be everyone else!" Pasta realized! "If no one wants to be my friend then... I shall make my own!" he said as he jumped up from his pile of play girl magazines.


Pasta the Hut's favorite edition

Pasta the Hut decided to run off to the MASTER SERBIAN MULTI CREATOR... Pfeiffer the Serb. "Oh wise sage of multiple identities teach me your ways" Pasta the Hut begged on his knees to Pffiefer the Serb.

Pfeiffer the Serb replied "Your life is filled with pity and rage. You will be an ultimate pain the rear end for all those you encounter. Why should I give you the wisdom of armies?"

Pasta the Hut did not respond with words but merely with actions. He stayed on his knees and did what every girl was taught to do.


As we all know Pasta the Hut just NEVER QUITS!

Pfeiffer the Serb now fully relieved from his stress of the day was in a good enough mood to give the googable knowledge to the sad little pasta boy.

As Pasta the Hut squeeled with glee he ran off to his little hill in Serbia and got to work. He tried again, and again, and again, and again. Soon enough he had friends. Even with some one to listen to to him rant about turks and other meaningless things Pasta the Hut still lacked something.

"But of course! If I can't be truly happy... no one can." Ajay Pasta realized!

Then Pasta, with his new home made friends, traveled to the great prosperous land of the eUSA. After a few more loads (😉) Pasta was able to get CS for him and his buddies.

After many failed attempts at trying to seduce the educated mass to join him he realized the only people he could coerce to join him was those that didn't know of his past. The noobs.


The only ones who listen to Pasta

After months of failed PTO attempts Pasta was able to round up enough of these noobs to create a force. This force was called the AmericanSerbian Eagle Division! With his political agenda packed behind it he created a political party the New Covenant Party! As time went on more noobs were misguided and tricked into believing Pastas lies. Soon enough his numbers grew and as he sneaked some of his own into congress his plans unfolded. The Serbians were invading!


Raww raww were serbs!

As it soon looked like Pasta was going to be able to harm the US of A two great heroes emerged from the sunrise! It was none other then Oblige and Pig in Zen!

With Obliges mighty power of strategy he defeated Pasta in his Spanish hide out in Galicia! While distracted in his Spain ONE HQ Pizza took advantage of Pasta's fury and rescued the poor misguided noobs of the New Covenant Party! As Pasta saw his defeat he cried and cried.

He realized soon that his plan was never going to succeed. All the damage he had done was being recovered as Pig and Oblige guided the brain washed noobs into the DoE mentoring program. He ran off back to Serbia to join his rightful place at the bottom of their heels. Pasta the Hut looked back and with a vengful look screamed "Im going to retire now! Sort of!"

The end

Now to finish this bowl.. of pasta!


E-rep Fan fiction entry:
http://www.erepublik.com/en/article/-day-1525-yet-another-contest-1952234/1/

Think you can do better than me? You probably can im under the influence for gods sake. Go ahead and click on that article and just try!

Unrelated note: http://www.erepublik.com/en/citizen/profile/5182279