Novum Politicum

Day 1,878, 13:31 Published in USA USA by Gnilraps


Novum Politicum
Day 1,878 of the New World
10 January, 2012
eRepublik is an equal playing field.

It is a rubber-walled romper room where old men, young women, hare-brained-crazies, drug-addicted convicts, and your mother all grapple with the same limitations and possibilities.

And so it is never a surprise when a completely stark-raving-mad lunatic (who is also a really big jerk) gains enough power in this game to actually begin spoiling it for everyone else.

That’s started to happen here in eUSA where a desperation for self-aggrandizement has sent once crazy retard into the hands of eUSA’s worst enemies. This pusillanimous pudwhack, together with his legion of PTO-hungry-serbots has cast a turgid pall over the landscape of eUSA.

Here is a short list of some of the things ruined by America’s Freeky A**holes:

Now we have “unity elections”.
This crap smells. Parties no longer function as a base of power for politically hopeful individuals. Because the threat of PTO outweighs ALL OTHER CONCERNS (and it does), National elections are decided by a few power brokers instead of allowing for the organic unfolding of competitive political influence to shape an election. Even though our public enemy #1 complains about this same fact, it is he himself who has brought it upon us.

Now we have lousy bonuses.
This is another pile of stink. Because these Freedom-Haters continue to grant eUSA Citizenship to more and more of our enemies, we are forced into the horrible decision of having to make eUSA Citizenship something nobody would want. How? By throwing away the only game mechanic that offers any real economic advantage, Region Bonuses. Even though our public enemy #1 complains about this same fact, it is he himself who has brought it upon us.

Our Military strength serves no real purpose
This is a third giant turd. It used to be that we would fight desperate battles against equally desperate enemies in an effort to gain and hold 100/100 bonuses and/or in effort to strip our enemies of their bonuses. This forced us all to learn how the eRep map works, how game mechanics work, and it gave us a reason to hit that ugly FIGHT button. But sadly our biggest enemy is now within our borders, so the FIGHT button is useless in our most meaningful battle. I am sure most of eUSA is tired of moving to fight, of not having any eUSA battles for True Patriot gold (which must be killing our Newb growth), and is generally BORED with the only aspect in this game that offers us true growth. Even though our public enemy #1 complains about this same fact, it is he himself who has brought it upon us.

We have become an uninteresting ally in the global community.
This is an entire back yard filled with a month’s worth of un-cleaned-up dog poo. In times past, eUSA was a desirable ally. Nations would court our favor because we had a lot to offer. Regardless of what drama might be unfolding within our borders, we were secure enough to be able to extend our energies outward to assist another Nation when the cause was just and the timing was right. eUSA has been the kingpin in numerous military, political, and economic overseas operations. But lately? Because all of our energy is focused internally we just don’t have much to spare for anyone else. Brother can you spare a dime? Um… no. It shouldn’t surprise anyone that our Public Enemy #1 doesn’t even give a crap about this loss to eUSA’s dignity and glory… all he cares about is himself.

But there is one thing left in eRepublik which gives eUSA a decided advantage over her bane. And it has to do with my opening thought, “eRepublik is an equal playing field.” This means that every person counts as 1 – for our enemy as well as for ourselves.

Just as AFA has had to build itself CS request by CS request (and multi by multi), we too build the resistance one loyal citizen at a time.

And we have all the advantages. We have a head start. We already have a slim edge in size. We are not lead by a deranged looney. And most of all… we are fighting to defend our home.

Only one thing will finally oust the cancer that is within us.
Vastly Superior Unified Numbers.

If we were fighting against eSerbia on the battlefield, the key to victory would be a proliferation of Q7 tanks, Energy Bars, and masses of clickers in all four Divisions, all clicking FIGHT against the same enemy.

But we are not fighting against eSerbia. We are fighting against ePsychopathguy and his proxy-logging serbots. And so what we must do if we ever want eUSA Citizenship to equate with FUN again is to unify against the AFA en masse.

There is a movement afoot that is (in addition to being hastily misjudged) promising to unify the common-sensified population against the seedy seditionists sidling slimily up side-by-side with us.


They are not asking you to leave your party.
They are not asking you to abandon your independence.
They are not asking you to submit to any god or person.

They simply want your agreement that the only true threat to our sovereignty is the one attempting to seize it from within.

SPQR historically was a tenuous balance of factions which had no particular love for one another, but who recognized that the survival of Roma was a duty which bound them in purpose.

(e)SPQR now must also become a tenuous balance of factions which need no particular love for one another (when was the last time you saw Oblige and Inwegen agree about ANYTHING!?!?), but who must recognize that by unifying our number, we so vastly outsource our wretched enemy that a new day will soon dawn. And in the Nova Roma, eRepublik will once again be the fun game which bound us together in the first place.

SPQR IN OUR MINDS,
SPQR IN OUR HEARTS,
NOW AND FOREVER!

You may now return to your regularly scheduled clicking