[Euro MoFA] Important, Completely Serious Foreign Affairs Update

Day 1,969, 20:21 • Published in Australia Netherlands • by lancer450


'Sup eAussies,

I apologise for this very late update. I decided just to throw something together last minute to keep you all informed. To be honest, it’s been a hectic first week as your Minister for Foreign Affairs (Europe). I can safely say, I deeply regret taking on this position and I have been as unproductive as possible this past week. No, no. Don’t thank me. Please. I’m just doin’ my job folks.

So, let’s see what I’ve been up to this past week.

I started off by sending out a t!t load of insulting messages to my counterparts as well as the CPs of each and every European country, even countries NOT in Europe per se, such as ePakistan, eIran, eEgypt, eSaudi Arabia, eIsrael, and the eUAE, despite my portfolio technically not pertaining to these regions. It was exhausting.


I promise you, I was just resting my eyes.

While sending out these messages, I managed to coerce eSerbia and ePoland to agree to wipe eChile and eIndonesia off the map for eternity.


I assure you that the deal we made is absolutely binding and is as tight as a virgin's p*ssy.

The rest of the cabinet has been a b*tch to work with. The worst one, I can honestly say, has been DraimAlexander. He’s all like, “Maybe we should work hard this month, guys.”


Needless to say, the rest of the cabinet was not very receptive of his hardworking, arrogant attitude.

I’ve also been providing fantastic advice to our beloved CP, irule777. Just yesterday, I announced my brilliant plans to solve ALL of eAustralia’s foreign policy difficulties.


I know, I know. It’s perfect. I can’t believe I didn’t think of it before.

Anyways, I’m looking forward to what the rest of the month has in store. I’m certain it will provide me with further opportunities to embarrass and humiliate the rest of the government and the people of eAustralia.

Thank you,

Beam me up, scottty!