[EN] Spain Surrenders to USA!

Day 2,579, 21:43 • Published in Spain USA • by Cerb
URGENT NEWS BULLETIN: Spain surrenders to the USA prior to the attack!

Minutes ago, Spanish President BruTaL619 announced the total and unconditional surrender of the Spanish colonies and mainland to the United States of America and the American President Deepchill. He could not be reached for comment, but experts believe that it is most likely due to the historical fact that the USA has wiped Spain on several occasions, most notably the total annihilation it received at the hands of President Cerb after evicting Spain from American soil. Indeed, hundreds of days ago, Spain was kicked out of the USA and defeated handily by Cerb and the succeeding Alexander Auctorias administration.



Spain's Minister of Education, Liwe, proposed this new Spanish flag in honor of the invading American army. It overlays the American stars and stripes onto the normal Spanish flags. The Spanish Parliament is expected to vote on it later today.



This morning, one of our reporters overheard the Spanish MoFA and multi-account of BruTaL619, tucan619, lamenting in frustration, "Why are we so bad at making friends and so good at making enemies? We need Durruti back to teach us foreign policy."

Some Spaniards are already evacuating to the USA because of the USA's superior economy and the upcoming invasion. The man pictured below is the first of many to flee the shrinking Spanish nation.



Many Spaniard officials are worried that the USA will teach Spain foreign policy and diplomacy, Will Rogers style. "Diplomacy is the art of saying 'nice doggie' until you can find a rock." Stand by to see what rocks the great nation of the United States of America has in its arsenal if Spain does not follow through on its surrender. Asterian princess HisAirness admitted America is unstoppable, saying "From center of galaxy Milky Way everyone can see USA is in huge advantage beforehand everyone."

Yes, huge advantage to the USA.