The Legend of Tayto Piggy :Chapter 1

Day 1,942, 14:27 • Published in Ireland Ireland • by Releasethe Krakken


Tayto Piggy was eating his favorite Bang Bang Spicy Thai Rough Cuts Tayto


and had a flashback of his youth before he was known as Tayto Piggy at that time the humans knew him only as irishbhoy1967. He thought back about the legend of how Tayto came to be in the farm. As Maybel Sheep used to tell it "Ya know Tayto in the early years uhmm spegh speghh farmer fred was known as the man with the worst luck in Ireland. So it came that he entered a Tayto competition : First and only prize being a lifetime supply of Tayto chips. So ya see spegh spegh ughmm ughmmm what he didnt know was that nobody else entered for the competition as it seemed to most a curse. At that time he had just settled at rocky hollow with his new bride Maybeline. Yes and so he the first shipment came and Fred and Maybeline ate with quite a wondrous joy them Tayto chips. After 12 months as Fred was one day coming from the barn he nearly got killed as Maybeline charged him with the hayfork and screamed one more if we eat one more or get one more bag of that damn chips I will put the unluckiest man in Ireland right under the ground where he belongs.. So fred had to make a plan quickly and that night as he was sweating in bed with Maybeline beside him staring at him with clenched teeth. It came to him. Maybeline he screamed eureka we will feed them Tayto chips to the pigs and from then it was so that Rocky Hollow pig population had a stable diet of Tayto chips and the occasional apple.

At that time Tayto piggy was quite a boisterous young piglet smelling the behinds of all the animals rolling in all kind of shite. We can say that he was as happy as a pig covered in shite. On that faithful day farmer fred delivered the first batch of Tayto chips to their troughs. You must understand that this was not just ordinary pigs these pigs had developed quite a palette . They would stand there and say Welma you know these strawberries it must be from farmer johnson its quite delectable. And so on and so forth. So at first all the pigs tasted the chips a pained expression came over the faces of the old pigs and Fat Johnson their leader said Jezus Jezus what in the name of the lord is that fred Farmer fellow feeding us know it tastes like a thousand mouse pooping in my mouth. No this cant be.. But in their midst they heard chomp chomp chomp mmmm chomp chomp chomp and they saw little irishbhoy1967 going crazy over the chips. For 2 hours they watched in disgust as he fed and fed and fed until he started standing still and started swaying hither and tither till he fell on his side and rolled on his backside. They thought he died but he just couldnt eat anymore there was a crazed expression in his face and he was heard murmuring more more more. Worried they tought he would die until he let out this long winding fart something like whoooopharteed. he fell asleep with the happies expression they have ever seen on any piglets face and from that day he was known as Tayto Piggy and the legend of there is always one was borm...End of chapter 1.