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You are reading an article written by a citizen of eRepublik, an immersive multiplayer strategy game based on real life countries. Create your own character and help your country achieve its glory while establishing yourself as a war hero, renowned publisher or finance guru.

Got jokes?

Day 5,972, 08:37 • Published in Canada Canada

• by Quimbie Muffins II

Hi kids, Quimbie here, I thought, in the spirit of playful engagement, that it might be a lark to have a thread dedicated to jokes, puns, one-liners, memes, any old thing that makes you giggle.

I'll start:

Your mama is so classless, she could be a Marxist utopia.

Whatchu got?

Kisses,
Quimbie

Comments

Rolo Tahmasee Day 5,972, 10:18

Right Here

https://www.erepublik.com/en/citizen/profile/3509622

Vexing Chaos Day 5,972, 14:16

[removed]

Vexing Chaos Day 5,974, 08:41

Aw my 1st FP in ages. Whatever will I do? 🤡

Quimbie Muffins II Day 5,972, 10:21

A seal walked into a club.

grindarkly Day 5,972, 22:29

Yikes! his fate is sealed. I highly doubt he'll walk back out based on circumstances.

Princess Rhaenyra Targaryen Day 5,972, 13:21

the biggest joke who likes losing elections https://www.erepublik.com/en/citizen/profile/3509622

Vexing Chaos Day 5,972, 14:16

LOLOLOL LOVE IT. RENT FREE IN YOUR HEAD CUNT. AS MUCH AS YOU LIKE LOSING MEDALS.

Majial Day 5,972, 15:02

Nobody likes the *c* word and nobody deserves it being thrown at them imho.

Rylde Day 5,972, 15:45

He's inherited the title of village idiot from me. Long may he reign

Rylde Day 5,973, 15:10

Obviously you approve of his actions Majial and he represents all the qualities your party strives for as a supported CP candidate.

Vexing Chaos Day 5,972, 15:48

[removed]

Vexing Chaos Day 5,972, 15:49

I'd have to be an idiot in order to be bestowed that title. That's all you. Keep it. It suits you.

Rylde Day 5,972, 17:27

Unfortunately with the use of the current colorful language you have shown true idiocy. The village idiot title is stripped from me. Long may you reign.

Vexing Chaos Day 5,972, 18:03

Call a spade a spade isn't idiocy.

Rylde Day 5,972, 18:09

Whatever keeps that title strapped to your waist you do you.

Majial Day 5,972, 21:27

Are you two seriously arguing in a thread meant for good natured dad jokes?

Grow up.

Rylde Day 5,972, 22:29

Actually majial if you want to get technical you started arguing with him first as you didnt like what he said. Just pointing that out there for ya so go suck an egg you uppity ****.

Majial Day 5,972, 22:52

Again telling everyone that an egg has more appeal than yourself.

Rylde Day 5,973, 00:01

Are you seriously arguing in a thread meant for good natured dad jokes Majial?

Grow up.

Vexing Chaos Day 5,973, 15:44

You some of the stupidest 💩.

Rylde Day 5,973, 15:53

Yeah that means alot coming from the village idiot

Vexing Chaos Day 5,973, 16:01

Imagine a moron like you calling me an idiot. That's too cute. 🤡

Rylde Day 5,973, 16:11

Imagine walking around calling everyone the C word and thinking your not

Vexing Chaos Day 5,973, 16:15

[removed]

Rylde Day 5,973, 16:19

Sounds exactly like what the village idiot would say

Vexing Chaos Day 5,973, 16:22

Are you a broken record or just that retareded?

Rylde Day 5,973, 16:23

If your gonna call me retarded atleast spell it right. Village idiot strikes again

Vexing Chaos Day 5,973, 16:25

[removed]

Vexing Chaos Day 5,973, 16:26

you're*

Rylde Day 5,973, 16:28

Long may you reign

Vexing Chaos Day 5,973, 16:31

Hard may you fall.

Rylde Day 5,972, 14:35

3 explorers are captured by a primitive tribe and taken before the village chieftain and given a choice of death or Unga Bunga.

First guy says well sh** I dont wanna die so i pick Unga Bunga.

3 tribesman with the biggest D***s come out and f*** him in the a** and the explorer limps away.

2 guy looks in fear and says well I got a family back home I gotta make it back and picks Unga Bunga. Afterwards he crawls away.

The 3rd a young cocky buck defiantely says chieftain I choose death.

The chieftain raises his hands in celebration and cries "Death by Unga Bunga"!!!

Wilhem Klink Day 5,972, 16:21

Guy walks into a bar carrying 12-foot jumper cables. The bartender says "Hey, Hey! You can't bring those in here!". The guy replies "Oh, its OK. I won't start anything"

Wilhem Klink Day 5,972, 16:22

A crisp new $5 bill walks into a bar. The bartender turns to him and says "Sorry you can't come in. This is a singles bar".

Majial Day 5,972, 16:48

Perfect DAD joke.

Code-Y Day 5,972, 16:37

What do you call a priest with a law degree?

Father, in law😉

Majial Day 5,972, 16:38

Punerific.

Majial Day 5,972, 16:44

Why did the scarecrow win an award?

Because he was outstanding in his field

ghoti Day 5,972, 17:33

A guy walks into a bar. Ouch!

Pat Harper Day 5,972, 23:44

A soldier ran up to a nun. Out of breath he asked, "Please, may I hide under your skirt.
I'll explain later..

The nun says "Okay, but keep your eyes closed, I do not want you to see anything too personal.”

A moment later two Military Police ran up and asked,
"Sister, have you seen a soldier?"
The nun replied, "He went that way."
After the MPs ran off, the soldier crawled out from under her skirt and said, "I can't thank you enough, sister. You see, I don't want to go to Iraq."
The nun said, "I understand completely, and thank you for keeping your eyes closed."

“But, wait-how did you know I kept my eyes closed?"

“Because you are still calling me sister. I do not want to go to war either."

Quimbie Muffins II Day 5,973, 04:41

Zen koans for the Internet age:

If an anonymous comment goes unread, is it still irritating?

What is the sound of no hands texting?

If nobody likes your selfie, what is the value of the self?

To see a man’s true face, look at the photos he hasn’t posted.