Join the new world

I'm sure I don't know half the people who come to my house. Indeed, for all I hear, I shouldn't like to.
-Oscar Wilde

I have noted that many of my articles begin with an apology for the time period since the last. As apologising again would be dangerously repetitive; I have elected to blame Jamesw.

’Oh no you don’t, Mr Canuck’

As repetitiveness has already been alluded to in the beginning of this article; we can thus observe the second aforementioned observation – The Canucks. Yes, as you may have noticed, they’re romping down their motherland of the United Kingdom and making steady progress towards our serene, knife-crime bastion, London. Such misfortune for our Canadian brothers, to have to govern the wilderness of the English countryside, should be noticed. Their recent conquest of Milton Keynes is worthy of most dramatic condolences.

What they were expecting


Tourist Northern England.

What they got


Northern England.

It is thus no real loss for Britain that the Canadians should have the shock-horror of governance over such barbarous confederations of warring tribes; and I give their Crimson Order the best of luck at controlling the ‘estates’ there.

Meanwhile, British forces were deployed in the continental mainland yesterday to help ward off the Polish from our long-time friend and ally Germany. The Netherlands, unfortunately, had to be annexed in order to provide a gateway into the troubled area; but there have been as of yet no real indications of morale loss from the army over it due to the more liberal approach encompassed in that area.


Prince Charles enjoy the lack of regulations in the Netherlands

Back in the eUK homeland, Congress continues to fight the military over the controversial Armed Service’s Bill. In rage, several cannons were fired from Horseguards; where the rowdy ex-SAS veterans were promptly given an ASBO. The Prime Minister, Jamesw, orders the military to conduct it’s own reforms; threatening Parliament with his resignation. In view of the interesting views of who would take his stead, an amendment was quickly made and submitted. As the army didn’t like it, the former Chief of General Staff, Artela, then orders a contentious increase of Parliamentary security.

MP Death T(r)oll: 6


Very reasonable and unpretentious increase of security at Westminster.

Additionally; Keram the Foreign Office Minister, submitted his report on foreign affairs in the announcements section of the eUK external forum this morning. A rescue party has been detached to find the bodies of the Civil Servants that disappeared after writing most of it.


Desk of the Ministry of Foreign Affairs.

Finally, discussions concluded today between the main army and the private Militia, the ‘Home Guard’; also known as Dad’s army, which consisted mainly of former SAS veterans. On the whole, negotiations went quite well, until Army Command spotted a devious trick.


New CGS Count Drakula having very reasonable discussions with Cap’t SHA Mannering.

Yours, as always,


Lt. Col. Sir Humphrey Appleby MP, MiD x2, SAS, QC, GCB, KBE, MVO, MA (Oxon)
Former Cabinet Secretary for the eUK
Former British Minister of Foreign Affairs and Trade


I shall leave you with this funny picture, as a sign of eternal gratitude for making it this far.