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Pot pourri

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Eating In the Fifties and Sixties

-- Curry was a surname.
-- A takeaway was a mathematical problem.
-- A pizza was something to do with a leaning tower.
-- All potato crisps were plain; the only choice we had was
whether to put the salt on or not.
-- Rice was only eaten as a milk pudding.
-- Calamari was called squid and we used it as fish bait.
-- A Big Mac was what we wore when it was raining.
-- Brown bread was something only poor people ate.
-- Oil was for lubricating, fat was for cooking.
-- Tea was made in a teapot using tea leaves and never green.
-- Sugar enjoyed a good press in those days, and was regarded as being
white gold. Cubed sugar was regarded as posh.
-- Fish didn't have fingers in those days.
-- Eating raw fish was called poverty, not sushi.
-- None of us had ever heard of yogurt.
-- Healthy food consisted of anything edible.
-- People who didn't peel potatoes were regarded as lazy.
-- Indian restaurants were only found in India.
-- Cooking outside was called camping.
-- Seaweed was not a recognized food.
-- "Kebab" was not even a word, never mind a food.
-- Prunes were medicinal.
-- Surprisingly, muesli was readily available,
it was called cattle feed.
-- Water came out of the tap. If someone had suggested bottling it and
charging more than petrol for it, they would have become a laughing
stock!!

But the one thing that we never ever had on our table in the sixties ...
Elbows or Phones!

Jokes

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During a recent visit to a community museum, our four-year-old daughter,
Sophie, was fascinated by an interactive display of an old-fashioned
telephone and switchboard.

We explained to her that, many years ago, she'd speak to an operator,
who would then help make the call by plugging a cord into the
appropriate jack.

With my wife pretending to operate the switchboard, Sophie picked up the
antique phone and asked, "Mommy, could you please connect me to the
Internet?"

---

The other day my friend, Sarah, was flipping the pages of the latest
Hello
magazine. The magazine did a feature on "100 Most Eligible Bachelors."

After watching her flip through the entire magazine twice, I asked her,
"What is wrong?"

"I've searched from cover to cover, and I still can't find the order
form!"
she replied.

---

A blonde studying to be a counselor always went into her counseling
sessions
with an ear muff over one ear.

After a while the supervisor became very curious and asked her about it.

She replied, "It's for confidentiality."

"Confidentiality?" asked the bewildered supervisor.

"Yes, confidentiality," the blonde explained, "I've been told what goes
in
one ear comes out the other, and I don't want anyone else knowing what
my
client says."

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Claustrophobic people are more productive thinking out of the box.