Join the new world

The entertainment 'industry' in the eUK has gone downhill. Now that Horice G Fossil has wrote his last article and left (providing that one panel comic of his wasn't a sick joke) all we have left is the Polandballs that occur once every bloody-ages (technical term). So I have to entertain myself, oh dear.

As such, I wondered what I could do to make myself less bored. So here's Rob the Bruce's totally unbiased GUIDE TO ALL PARTIES OR AT LEAST A FEW OF THEM, OK THEN JUST THE TOP 5 AT THE TIME OF WRITING, WHATEVER



On your right, we have The Unity Party, otherwise known as TUP.



This lot are the biggest party, their CP candidates pretty much always win, they always get the most seats on congress and I think personally a lot of their members don't think when they vote, god damn TUP CP candidates are often the dullest people on the planet, yet always do really well. This party is also home to the eternal eUK overlord Iain Keers, that guy that does the articles that never do but always should have a tl;dr, and also the guy that's very very rich in game terms. If you join this lot you'll have a chance of a spot in congress every month, no doubt. However becoming PP or CP with these guys may be challenging due to the huge amount of people 4 times as old as you.

To the left we have The British Army (used to be New Era. is called New Era again.)

The closest thing I could find to their current picture. They make themselves hard to find on google images with their crappy common names

This lot used to spend their time having ridiculous arguments with mr Invalidation, which usually ended up with the mindless New Era fanatic Commander Dapper making a bit of a t*t of himself.

Now that the party's the British Army, literally nothing happens any more. It's just an empty vessel hollenboer drives around blindly to try and get himself as CP, which, despite the blind voting of most of the 117 members, never happens. Dapper still makes an arse of himself, but not in the name of the party any more.
It would be fine if hollenboer was a cool, funny, intelligent guy that could run this one man show effectively. Unfortunately, he appears to be bloody useless and can't even grasp the concept that you need to write articles during a CP run. Hell the place was better back when they were accusing everybody of cheating and generally being d*cks. Just a dull place now. Avoid until somebody PTO's it or something.


Next up on this guide is the UK Reform Party, or the UKRP.



Now I'll be honest, I don't know much about this lot. What I do know is their acronym bloody annoys me because it's only one letter different from my party's (UKPP). One of us needs to make a change there, but nobody's got any better solutions so everybody has to remain annoyed about that. (everybody being pretty much just me). They have some well educated fellows in this party, decent guys etc. Not a giant barrel of laughs but they work efficiently. If I remember correctly from an article of theirs I skimmed over once there's some kind of test you have to do or message somebody or something to get a congress spot, so if your not prepared to do work prepare to sit on your arse all day in here. Unless they've changed that, it was a while ago and I kind of ignore them really.


Now we have the People's Communist Party, or PCP.



eCommunism is a joke. Due to game mechanics everybody being equal and socialist and all that soviet crap is pretty much impossible. As such, PCP is more or less like any other party, a few intelligent blokes pushing buttons and making sure the party's successful and such, but with a role-playing element of sorts. Pretty much everything they do is claimed to be Communist, by joining you become a communist despite not being one.
That aside, nobody's a complete w*nker so you'd be OK joining, I'd particularly recommend it if you enjoy the Commie Crap.

Moving on, finally we have the United Kingdom Progression Party, or UKPP.



This party has me in it. It's also currently merging with the GBDP. So if you like me or the GBDP then... yeah. This place is pretty much srs business mixed with a bit of chatter and banter and so on. Nothing particularly ground breaking, admittedly, but a decent party with plenty of decent people and opportunities for PP and Congress. PP is a little harder to get than congress, but more possible here than in places like TUP with it's old guy overload.

If you join UKPP, entry fee of 2 gold paid to me. Honest, totally not me fooling you for quick cash. That's immoral and stuff.