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How may I service you, America?

1,775 jour, 20:26 Published in USA États-Unis de fingerguns

I think if you're unwilling to practice what you preach, then you should probably shut your stupid mouth and stop preaching so much, amirite?

Since I started playing eRep, I've been talking about how important parties are to serving newbs and how a solid party structure and a strong Top 6 will make the eUS unstoppable. That was years ago and recent changes to game mechanics make it more obvious than ever that we NEED parties to be awesome.

For the last couple of weeks, as we stare down one threat after another, I have been stressing the importance of drawing clear lines and putting personal stuff aside for the greater good. We simply have to work together no matter how butthurt we are.

I'm walking the walk.

I won't bore you with the history of my rivalry with Pfeiffer (Henry Arundel, if you didn't know), but I will say this- it all started because of how we view parties and their role in this game. He favors mechanics and politicking. Parties are just how you get elected. I favor community building and services. Parties are where you live.

Over the years, Pfeiffer has excelled in this game taking on various roles and positions and moving his way up. He's burned a lot of bridges and pissed off a lot of people, but he is undeniably loyal to the eUS and aggressively pursues what he believes is the best course of action. He is right to be so focused on mechanics and politics. That's his strength. That's what he's for. It makes him very valuable. That he chooses to be so active is just a bonus.

I have probably pissed off plenty of people who I felt were disrupting the harmony of my world, but I know I've helped drastically more. To me, being successful is helping other people succeed and be their best. That makes me super happy. That's what drives me and makes this game not a total waste of time. I love Feds. I love being proud/horny. I love how serious we are about security and protecting elections and treating parties like States. I love that we all get chubs when eRep clicks with a new player and they start throwing down great ideas and getting involved. I get a raging heart on when Feds help each other out and do the right thing and ask good questions.

I want every party to have that. I want the entire country to feel that. I want proud/horny to be the cry of the eUS, not just the Federalist Party. P/H is all about unity and common purpose and success. The eUS needs that.

Pfeiffer and I reconnected recently because of the many threats facing the nation. We are both party leaders, we both put country first so we worked together to come up with solutions. Perhaps it was just because so much time had passed or just the seriousness of the situation, but we stopped seeing each other as rivals and saw how badly we needed to work together. From there developed a real appreciation for each other's strengths. When he asked me to run with him, it made ridiculous sense. What we just did is exactly what the eUS needs to do.

The simple truth is that this game can't be ALL mechanics and ALL politics, nor can it be ALL social stuff. There has to be a balance. VP isn't always an important position, but I hope to really do something with this opportunity should you elect us. I know how to build an effective party from the ground up. I know how to make it functional and fun. I know how to organize services that keep newbs informed and engaged in this game so they don't get suckered in by snake oil salesmen.

I won't pretend to know anything about alliances or Congressional policies and procedures. That's not what I'm for. I will learn what I need to learn, do whatever is asked of me and serve this nation to the best of my ability. But my focus will be on making parties awesome and getting focused on the right things so we can be the UNITED States. A house divided against itself cannot stand and other applicable cliches. We have to fix this and I think a Henry Arundel/Fingerguns ticket is a good way to go about it.

Hear from the man himself: Live Deliberately, America



fingerguns 1,775 jour, 20:28


Bucephalus92 1,775 jour, 20:31

Good luck

Duncan Crowe
Duncan Crowe 1,775 jour, 20:31


Time to buy a new mouse, guess I voted this post a little too hard.

BugsBunnyz 1,775 jour, 20:32

totally tl;dr but voted anyway 😉

Malpazar 1,775 jour, 20:35

voted, will read eventually.

Pfeiffer. 1,775 jour, 20:39

Excellent article, love the art!

Neo Iasov
Neo Iasov 1,775 jour, 20:45

Hi fingerguns. Miss me?

DokJon 1,775 jour, 20:46


Your Loving Mother
Your Loving Mother 1,775 jour, 20:47

FingerGuns, making the country horny.
Not a bad slogan there.

Mike Schmittson
Mike Schmittson 1,775 jour, 21:10

Actually read. and voted 😛

Ronald Gipper Reagan
Ronald Gipper Reagan 1,775 jour, 22:15

Right. So... almost 30% of the American people agree with us.

Those people are not just going to suddenly decide to give in to your incessant bullying and PTOing...

so it is the divided states because you don't believe in letting your personal grudges go.

empty rhetoric is empty.

bigcdizzle 1,776 jour, 00:09

FG can service me any time...


Candor 1,776 jour, 01:02

Good read, V

The Original Hawkie
The Original Hawkie 1,776 jour, 02:48

Meh. The "look, I'm a woman, vote for me" card is so overplayed. Kind of a shame when the actual candidate has good qualities they could rely on instead.

Gravitas1555 1,776 jour, 04:23

1. Yes.
2. Proud
3. Yes
4. Horny
5. Yes


fingerguns 1,776 jour, 07:03

IstLtHawkeye: you chose not to read the content of the article. Don't put that on me.

Arrden 1,776 jour, 08:39


Bucephalus92 1,776 jour, 09:09

IstLtHawkeye, congrats bro, you get the idiot of the day award.

PigInZen 1,776 jour, 09:18

about time

Sir LeatherNeck
Sir LeatherNeck 1,776 jour, 09:24

1st Lt Hawkeye<


I lol'd

The Original Hawkie
The Original Hawkie 1,776 jour, 09:33

Idiot of the day? I thought Ajay had that won for an eternity in this game.

"Kind of a shame when the actual candidate has good qualities they could rely on instead." Let me break it down for you; I read the article, btw. Guess you couldn't be bothered to read my whole comment though.

What I am saying in simpler words: You can run, and likely win, without informing every basement dweller in this game that you're going to suck them off.

The Original Hawkie
The Original Hawkie 1,776 jour, 09:34

Clarification: In case you didn't realize that's what you were implying: That's what it means to "service someone."

Paul Proteus
Paul Proteus 1,776 jour, 09:35

IstLtHawkeye, kindly learn to read, it's a long arduous process but you know, it'll be worth it

Bia Pandora
Bia Pandora 1,776 jour, 09:49

Pfeiffer/Henry is the person most directly responsible for causing the rifts in our domestic issues. We all know it.

I would be impressed if he had tried to start mending fences more than a week/two before announcing a PotUS run. I've always seen the Feds as being the last party with integrity, I believe YOU mean it. However, a week or two of fence mending before his announcement to run for CP does not prove good intent or desire to change.

Chedomir|_I 1,776 jour, 10:01

I can't help my self but to agree with Lt Hawkeye, though I don't get upset about lady fingerguns being proud/horny, especially when she is calling someone her bro.

Bia Pandora
Bia Pandora 1,776 jour, 10:07

1stLtHawkeye is a very intelligent player. I might not always agree with her but she deserves to state her opinion without being called an idiot, people. Trust me, she is better educated than most and certainly knows how to read. She's entitled to her opinion without being called an idiot. This is exactly what our domestic problems have centered around.

Let's prove our intent in word AND actions, shall we? Unity doesn't happen if we can't at least hold a base respect for each other.

Publius 1,776 jour, 10:26


Iamnameless 1,776 jour, 10:30

Bia for POTUS

samdexter 1,776 jour, 11:07

My P/H hormones are high today..go baby go ..

Suzuki Ryosuke
Suzuki Ryosuke 1,776 jour, 11:08

Fingerholes, the best & only way for you to service America (and the rest of the world if you can endure...), is:

3 χτυπητά στον ουρανίσκο, γαργάρα και μετά κατάποση!!!

OMGWTFIDK 1,776 jour, 11:11

Hmmm this almost sounds like one of those extremely lame Hollywood romantic comedies that tend to flop due to being lame. You know the ones where two exact opposites somehow find a small connection and then they go on to live happily ever after................

Anyways go ahead and continue "servicing" eUSA, shame that you have to rely on such terminology when it's apparent you have a head on your shoulders.

My vote is still undecided, however I can guarantee it will not be for you.

OMGWTFIDK 1,776 jour, 11:12

Good luck though. 🙂

OMGWTFIDK 1,776 jour, 11:13


I doubt google translate did justice to the last part you said however I must say in the short time of paying attention to this crap well said lol.

The Original Hawkie
The Original Hawkie 1,776 jour, 11:17

"Anyways go ahead and continue "servicing" eUSA, shame that you have to rely on such terminology when it's apparent you have a head on your shoulders."


Alexander Valkor II
Alexander Valkor II 1,776 jour, 12:05

"He favors mechanics and politicking. Parties are just how you get elected. I favor community building and services."

Well that explains why he left the Federalist Party to join the United States Workers Party. Purely for political gain.

fingerguns 1,776 jour, 12:35

I don't HAVE TO rely on such terminology. I choose to.

I like jokes. Jokes are fun. Innuendo is fun.

You're free to make assumptions about me, but if you'd ever like to talk I'm usually in #fedpartychat. Come on by.

Joe DaSmoe
Joe DaSmoe 1,776 jour, 13:01


Oblige 1,776 jour, 13:10

Wait a minute, a VP *candidate* wrote an article?

So confused...

DW.Frost 1,776 jour, 13:59

Voted FG
Great Article.

Darkskye 1,776 jour, 14:51

We love you, FG. But I am puzzled why you would talk about a unity candidate in the last article, and now announce to be VP for a candidate who has a polarizing effect on voters. I think Pfeiffer has many good traits but I feel it is too risky to position him as our unity candidate since many good Americans simply wont vote for him. Whereas Largo can convince a larger population if supported by all parties. I think a Largo/Pfeiffer split will just make the other guy with bad english win.

fingerguns 1,776 jour, 15:35

I think that was in my article.

I can't tell everyone to put personal feelings and stale, old butthurt aside if I'm not willing to do the same thing. I know he's polarizing. Just last month I was ripping him apart for running under shady circumstances (in my opinion). Just recently, I banned him from the Fed forum. Right now I have close friends and party bros threatening to abandon me and the party if we support Pfeiffer.

fingerguns 1,776 jour, 15:37

But if I don't do this, who will?

Who is going to say 'you know what? The stuff I'm mad at you for happened sooooo long ago that the majority of current players need a long history lesson to even get it. I'm ready to let it go.'

I can't ask it of others if I'm not willing to do it myself. So this is me doing it. I'm doing it with Pfeiffer. (<-words no one has ever said before)

fingerguns 1,776 jour, 15:39

You don't have to support Pfeiffer. You like Largo better, that's cool. I've never met him or seen him online, but I hear he's a cool guy.

I firmly believe in a Unity candidate. If Pfeiffer is not the guy the majority of parties choose, then I will gladly support Largo.

OMGWTFIDK 1,776 jour, 16:02

"I don't HAVE TO rely on such terminology. I choose to.

I like jokes. Jokes are fun. Innuendo is fun."

I concur jokes are fun, however considering the situation at hand (regardless of how long ago the "butthurt" started) it would have been wiser if you had used the "head on your shoulders" to make a more precise and direct article that was as blunt as possible in order to approach the eNation in my opinion.

Hence my earlier statement indicating you use that phrase.

OMGWTFIDK 1,776 jour, 16:02

Being a smart a** I know there is always a right time and a wrong time when joking. This time in my opinion it was ill-timed. As for your "assumptions" none were made or have been made by myself at least. It's not in my character be it on or off line to do such, however I may take some time and join in the irc one day and have a chat with you.

Publius 1,776 jour, 17:19

Fingerguns I am offended and demand that all your future articles cover the girls with burqas.

George S. Patton Jr
George S. Patton Jr 1,776 jour, 17:42

Exactly what kinda of ''service'' we talking about.

Chance Harrison
Chance Harrison 1,776 jour, 18:35

All I heard was blah blah blah.... take your own advice and STFU.

AlexJ1890 1,776 jour, 20:46

People talk about Largo being able to bring the nation together, even though I've only talked to him once in 8 months of playing and that was a few days ago on irc which I have never seen him on. Seems a little late to be starting using irc a week before you run for PotUS. I've also heard that he hasn't been very active, and he's promised to be more active. Glove said the same thing, and we all know how that turned out. Definitely would not vote for him.

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