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[Funky Militia] Updating the funk...

1,846 jour, 17:07 Published in United Kingdom Pologne de Rory Winterbourne

The story of the funk

You see, the Funk is a living creature. It's 'bout the size of a medicine ball, but covered in teats. It came from another planet, and landed on Bootsy Collins's house.

Back then Bootsy was just a simple farmer. But he took one look at all of those mauve titties and he lost his mind. He began to milk the Funk. Made himself a Funk shake. Began to feel fizzy inside. He found he could see 'round corners. Suddenly, he passed out. But when he came to, baby, he was slapping a bass guitar fast and loose like some kind of delirious, funky priest.

Two months later, he was world-famous with his band, Parliament, and everybody wanted a piece of the Funk: Rick Wakeman, even the Bee Gees. One day, Parliament was traveling on the mothership, fooling around with the Funk, when George Clinton kicked the Funk clean overboard.

That was July the Second, 1979, the Day the Funk died.

Two weeks later, I found the Funk, in bed with a conger eel. At first I thought it was a sea anenome, but under closer inspection, I realized it was a funky ball of tits from outer space. I offered to take him back to Parliament, but he said he was done with all that, and that they never listened to him anyway, and were only interested in his funky produce. So I let him live here, with me, in Funky Militia.


Call to Arms
We won a week or so back \o/ Congratulations to all involved, the prize Q7's will be distributed in strikes.

As awesome new competition run by Fenyang, with a new one starting tomorrow - hopefully a regular weekly event. Congratulations to Jimbobfrey who won 2690 GBP, commiserations to TheAlmightyLlama who brought loads of tickets 😛

Weekly Tanking competition
A new addition, with first,second and third in each division getting prizes - 100 Q7's total (14, 7 and 4 per division)
Division 1

Division 2

Division 3

Division 4

Contact me if you want one...

We also have a forum courtesy of the eUK forum and can be found in the 'Military' section (PM me for access if you don't have it already).

#Funky - direct link - enter your name and click go

More info

Commander: Rory Winterbourne
High Commander in charge of funky times: John Rupert Miranda
2nd Commanders: countyair5, Joshua Whelan
Sub Commander of Funk Jimbobfrey
Captains: Elvis Trout, countyair5

- We fight in the best interest of the UK and their allies, with most (if not all) daily orders being the same as those set by the Ministry of Defence
- Funky Militia is apolitical and encourage members to join whatever party they wish
- To help out fellow members in any way possible

- Most communiqué will be done through the shout box/messages and invite you to join #Funky on IRC for strikes and general frivolity.

Sent out the same day when possible:
- 16 Q6 weapons
- Unlimited food
- Q7’s on strikes

- Everyone has an opportunity to become a Captain of a regiment - elections on the 15th of every month (5 Q7 weapon reward)
- Recruitment - 2 Q7 weapons per person added to the MU and that become a member
- Ranking up - 2 Q7 weapons (post your new rank to get the weapons)
- Daily tanking challenge - random prizes

Rory o7


Major Lee Hung
Major Lee Hung 1,846 jour, 17:08

Funky article! Voted

lancer450 1,846 jour, 18:15


Madacaion 1,846 jour, 18:54

Voted for the funky funk story.

That and JRM held me at gunpoint 🙁

Azzy451 1,847 jour, 01:45

voted & subbed

Caers Mane
Caers Mane 1,847 jour, 03:25

I always get a kick out of your Funky intros but this one was the best yet 😃

Dan/naD Wilshire
Dan/naD Wilshire 1,847 jour, 09:27

\o Funky o/

Jimbobfrey 1,848 jour, 11:44

Voted and subbed. Great story - I would go so far as to say it is ....... Funky!


TheAlmightyLlama 1,848 jour, 11:56

Voted and subbed

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