[Titu] O Istorie romantata a eRomaniei / A Romanced View on eRomanian History

Day 489, 10:25 • Published in Romania USA • by Titu Maiorescu
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Traim vremuri nebune, pline de recorduri, batalii epice, cresteri de populatie spectaculoase, noi resurse descoperite in diverse regiuni (WSR, de exemplu, avea alaltaieri wood, oil, iron si clone high, acum resursele de clone au coborat la medium), parlamente rebele care dau jos presedinti si multa, multa pasiune. Nimic de care sa ne plangem, lumea cea noua mai are putin pana ajunge la 100.000 de locuitori, iar in eRomania sunt destule mii de cetateni.

Si totusi, cum era inainte de toata agitatia asta, in epocile de mult apuse ale lumii noi? Cum era sa te nasti in urma cu 6 luni, sau acum un an? Eu nu sunt istoric, nu am pretentia de a fi obiectiv, si, cum si mie imi place autenticitatea, voi lasa urmatoarele marturii sa vorbeasca pentru cetatenii care au intrat in comunitatea eromana in diferite momente. Nota Bene: marturiile nu sunt luate de la cetateni reali, ci doar inchipuite de cineva care a vazut destule.


Noiembrie 2007

"Salut. Sunt unul dintre primii cetateni din Lumea cea Noua, si, in acelasi timp, admin al acestui joc, care va fi cel mai tare in doar cateva luni. Avem chiar si un modul de razboi gata de a invrajbi oricare doi vecini. Faptul ca eu imi scriu aceste ganduri aici inseamna ca nu am deloc de lucru in alte compartimente si ca toate modulele functioneaza perfect... functioneaza perfect... functioneaza perfect..."

Decembrie 2007

"Salut! Ma numesc vasilica_016 si, cu ajutorul meu, vasilica si-a deschis cea de-a doua firma, la care lucrez cu spor in fiecare zi, in acelasi interval orar ca si colegii mei, producand mancare pentru toate clo... pentru toti cetatenii eRomaniei! Vasilica este inscris in Green Party, care este cel mai tare partid din eRomania, care a dat tarii pe primul sau presedinte, Marius. Marius este model renumit pe Youtube."

Ianuarie 2008

"Salut! M-am inscris pe siteul asta smecher, dar nu gasesc de unde se joaca jocul. Cine e DexterXP? Ce? Presedinte? Dar vad ca nu mai joaca! Cum? A fugit cu goldul? A deschis primele firme de stat si le-a lasat de izbeliste? Ce joc e asta, Erepublik sau RLpublik? In ce partid ma bag ca sa schimb asta de luna viitoare? Cum? In acelasi partid ca si presedintele? Aaa, iepurilah si Cristesco sunt cei mai buni prieteni? Sunt convins ca-s clone! Nu ma intereseaza, eu ma bag la Party Gerula, ca aia-s tari in gura!"

Februarie 2008

"Salut! Cand baga astia modulul de razboi, ca m-am plictisit rau de tot! Vreau sa tai in stanga si in dreapta, sa dau in toti, sa imi dea bani Garda Nationala! Cum, n-am voie daca am strength 2? Pai nu-i frumos! Ma duc sa mai fac o clona-doua, daca nu imi da Garda nimic."

Martie 2008

"Salut! Am auzit ca vor astia sa bage posibilitatea de a cumpara gold pe bani reali, deci io nu ma mai joc daca fac asta, ca nu e corect, ca eu sunt sarac, dar tot imi place jocul, ca daca baga pe bani o sa aiba toti firma de arme si o sa vina toti cu ciomegele sa ma bata care eu o sa fiu slab si n-o sa am cu ce sa dau in ei. Chiar daca tot nu avem razboi, tot o sa ma bata toti 🙁 Oare daca ma duc la prima intalnire Erepublik, o sa ma lase in pace?"

Aprilie 2008

"Salut! Sunt Andrei, si jucam linistit sokker.org cand au venit unii sa ma ia sa ma faca mare politician, m-au adus aici, mi-au pus in piept eticheta cu eUGD si mi-au dat stampile de vot. In orice caz, eu ma bucur ca e ziua nationala a eRomaniei, ca e scandal prin presa, ca se urzica dinozaurii, ca avem firme infloritoare... E de bine, nu?"

Mai 2008

"Salut! Ma cheama Calin. Eu am intrat direct in razboi, unde o turcoaica voluptoasa (zicea ca o cheama ceva, Nicogina, Nevuvita, Netrogila, nu mai stiu), aparuta de cine stie unde (ca doar eu eram in stepele ucrainene), ma apuca de guler si ma azvarle cat colo. Dar nu-i nimic, mai multi zdrahoni au rasarit ca din pamant in urma mea si au terminat luptele imediat. Ei, asta da Romanie Mare!"

Iunie 2008

"Salut! Am intrat fix in era comunista! Doamne, deci tipul asta crede ca economia poate fi desenata de o manusa de fier de la poalele eCotroceniului? Bine, am impresia ca perioada asta demonstreaza ca democratia este o forta foarte puternica si ca, orice masuri ar fi luate, economia este mai greu de influentat de acolo de sus pe cat s-ar crede. Si apoi, am intrat in Alianta Nordica, asa ca nimic nu ne mai sta in cale acum!"

Iulie 2008

"Salut! Nu pot sa cred ca si aici avem presedinte marinar si fost primar, precum acesta. Eh, macar asta de aici e ceva mai proactiv, macar asa, de inceput de mandat. Cand atacam Ungaria?"

August 2008

"Salut! Am atacat Ungaria! ATAT!"

Septembrie 2008

"Salut! Adminii nu ne-au lasat sa cucerim toata Ungaria, am auzit ca tot baga gandaci din cand in cand. Bine, sunt sigur ca sunt ultimele buguri, pentru ca o sa lanseze V1 luna viitoare si n-o sa mai fie deloc probleme!"

Octombrie 2008

Pentru luna octombrie nu am reusit sa strangem pareri pentru ca, desi s-a inscris destula lume, nu am avut cum sa ii contactam. A fost lansat V1.

Noiembrie 2008

"Salut! Ma numesc Dan si in viata de zi cu zi sunt medic pediatru. Erepublik a implinit 1 an si arata exact precum pacientii mei, in scutece, dragut si minimalist, dar cu potential de crestere mare... Ce? Prea multa aiureala? E role-playing! Cum? Nu e cu d-astea? Ok, ok, acuma intru in UGD."

Decembrie 2008

"Salut! Sunt Ana, abia am intrat in erepublik si sunt interesata de o cariera in modelism de eRepublik. Pot sa fiu orice, surora medicala la Crucea Rosie, surora crestineasca la Biserica eRomana sau, de ce nu, surora de presedinta de partid! Unde e linkul catre sedintele foto? Trebuie sa am vreun nivel anume sau...?"

Ianuarie 2009

"Salut! Vad ca avem Chisinau, Romania; Kiew, Romania; Budapest, Romania si Moscow, Romania. Pe unde ne mai ascutim armele in continuare?"

Februarie 2009

"Salut! Numele meu este Istvan şi sunt dornici de a fi parte din această mare ţară România, cel puţin pentru câteva săptămâni până când vor fi preluate de către Ungaria, cu o mare rezistenţă nouă, care este în curs de dezvoltare, chiar acum! Zoliii!"

Martie 2009

"Salut! Vand food Q1 la 1 RON, arme Q2 speciale pentru doborat indochickens la doar 21 RON (10 arme = 200 RON)! Cumparati doar de la mine, ceilalti 50 umbla cu inselaciune!"



Acest articol este aproape un pamflet. Orice asemanare cu persoane reale este pur intamplatoare si neintentionata. Orice asemanare cu persoane virtuale, in schimb...


English version starts here!

We are living crazy times, full of records, epic fights, baby booms, new resources discovered in different regions (West Siberian, for example, used to have high wood, oil, iron and clones, clone resources are down to medium now), rebellious parliaments that impeach their presidents and tons and tons of passion. Nothing to complain about, the New World has almost reached a population of 100.000, with several thousands in eRomania only.

But still, how were the old times, without all this humdrum? How was it being born 6 months ago, or a year ago? I am not an historian, I don't see myself as objective enough and, as I myself love authenticity, I will let the following testimonials speak for the citizens that have joined the eRomanian community at different points in time. Nota Bene: the testimonials do not belong to real ecitizens, but are the fruits of the mind of an imaginative veteran.


November 2007

"Hi! I am one of the first citizens of the New World, and, at the same time, admin of this game, a game that will be the best in only a few months' time. We even have a war module that is ready to have any two neighboring countries fight against each other. The fact that I am writing down some thoughts here means that I have absolutely nothing to do in other compartiments and that all modules work perfectly... work perfectly... work perfectly..."

December 2007

"Hi! My name is vasilica_016 and, with my decisive contribution, vasilica opened his second company at which I work restlessly each and every day, at about the same time of the day as my co-workers, producing food for all the clo... citizens of eRomania! Vasilica is a member of Green Party, which is the best party in eRomania, a party that has gifted the country with its first president, Marius. Marius is a well known model on Youtube."

January 2008

"Hi! I joined this awesome site, but I cannot find my way to the actual game. Who is DexterXP? What? President? But I see he isn't playing any more! What? He ran away with our gold? He opened the first government-funded businesses and then let them fall apart? What game is this, Erepublik or RLpublik? What party should I join so that I can bring the much needed change next month? What? Same party as the president? Ooh, iepurilah and Cristesco are best buddies? I am certain they are nothing but clones! I don't care, I'll join Party Gerula, that'll show'em!"

February 2008

"Hi! When are they going to introduce the war module? I am really bored! I want to hash and slay, shoot everybody down, I want to get funded by Garda Nationala! What do you mean I am not allowed as I only have strength 2? That's not at all cool! I am going to recruit myself a couple of clones, if the state won't fund me..."

March 2008

"Hi! I heard they are going to introduce the feature to purchase gold with real money, I'm not playing any more if they proceed, it's not fair, I'm poor, but I still like the game, and everybody will buy gold to establish weapon companies and they will all have sticks and stones to break my bones and I'll be weak and defenseless. Even if there's no possibility of war whatsoever, they are still gonna beat the cr[flowers and butterflies]p out of me! I am considering going to the first Erepublik meeting, maybe then they'll leave me alone."

April 2008

"Hi! I am Andrei, and I was minding my own business playing sokker.org when some dudes came to make me a grand politician, so they brought me here, stamped me with the eUGD stamp and taught me how to vote. Anyway, I am glad we have a National Day of eRomania, that the press is wildly animated, that the old-dinosaur-users are pis[kittens and cakes]ed, that our economy is blooming... That's good, right?"

May 2008

Hi! My name is Calin. I have gone straight to war, where a fine Turkish 'bayan' (she said her name was something, Nicogina, Nevuvita, Netrogila, I can't remember), summoned from the middle of nowhere (I was in the Ukrainian plains), grabs me by the neck and shoves me to the ground. But that was okay, as the true army was backing me and finished the fights with ease. Well, that's what I call a Great Romania!"

June 2008

"Hi! I apparently entered the fully-fledged communist era! Jeez, this guy thinks that the economy can be drawn with iron gloves from the foot of the National Palace? To be honest, I think this period shoes that democracy is fierce and should prevail and, whatever measures are taken, the economy is harder to play with than previously thought. Moreover, we entered the Northern Alliance, so nothing can stop us now!"

July 2008

"Hi! I can't believe that here too we have a sailor and former mayor for president (Note: just like the real president of Romania, Traian Basescu). Well, at least this one here is a bit more proactive for the beginning of his term. When do we strike Hungary?"

August 2008

"Hi! We attacked Hungary! THAT'S ALL!"

September 2008

"Hi! The admins did not let us conquer the entire Hungary, I've heard they are feeding us those cockroaches bugs from time to time. Erm, I'm sure these are the final and last bugs, because they are launching V1 next month and then there will be no problems whatsoever!"

October 2008

For the month of October we couldn't gather any opinions because, even though plenty of people registered, we couldn't get through to them. V1 was launched.

November 2008

"Hi! I am Dan and in my real life I am a pediatrician. Erepublik just arrived to the wonderful age of one year and looks exactly like my patients, diapered, cute and minimalist, but with a great growth ahead of it... What? Too much non-sense? It's called role-playing, man! What? This isn't the place? Ok, ok, I am going to eUGD just now."

December 2008

"Hi! I am Ana, I have just entered erepublik and I am interested in an e-modeling career. I can work as anything, medical nurse at the Red Cross, a nun at the eRomanian Church or, why not, the sister of a party chairwoman! Where is the link to the photoshoot? Do I have to reach a certain level first or...?"

January 2009

"Hi! I see we already have Chisinau, Romania; Kiew, Romania; Budapest, Romania and Moscow, Romania. Where are we going to use our weapons next?"

Februay 2009

"Hi! My name is Istvan and are eager to be part of this great country, Romania, at least until a few weeks will be taken by Hungary, with a high resistance to us, which is developing right now! Zoliii! "

March 2009

"Hi! I am selling Q1 food for 1 RON, special Q2 weapons for hunting Indochickens for only 21 RON (10 weapons = 200 RON)! Purchase only from me, the other 50 guys that are selling are just cheaters!"


This article is almost a pamphlet. Any resemblance to real persons is only by chance and unintentional. Any resemblance to virtual persons, though...