Join the new world

Some time ago, when I was still playing in Belgium, I published on a weekly basis 3 jokes about someone (mostly the one with whom we were at war at the moment). And I think this is the right moment to renew that custom. Enjoy.

1) Three men were all applying for the same job as a detective. One was Polish, one was Jewish, and one was Italian. Rather than ask the standard questions during the interview, the chief decided to ask each applicant just one question and base his decision upon that answer. When the Jewish man arrived for his interview, the chief asked, "Who killed Jesus Christ?" The Jewish man answered without hesitation "The Romans killed him." The chief thanked him and he left. When the Italian man arrived for his interview, the chief asked the same question. He replied "Jesus was killed by the Jews." Again, the chief thanked the man who then left. When the Polish man arrived for his interview, he was asked the exact same question. He thought for a long time, before saying, "Could I have some time to think about it?" The chief said, "OK, but get back to me tomorrow." When the Polish man arrived home, his wife asked "How did the interview go?" He replied, "Great, I got the job, and I'm already investigating a murder!"

2) Three prisoners, an American, a German, and a Pole, are scheduled to be executed by firing squad. They bring out the American and place him in front of the squad. He points and shouts, "Tornado!" They all look and the American runs away. Next, they place the German in front of the firing squad. He yells "Earthquake!" They all hit the dust and the German escapes. Next up is the Pole. He looks around and shouts "Fire!"

3) A Pole decided to commit suicide by hanging himself from a tree in the park. A few days later, a man was walking his dog and spotted him hanging from the tree. He asked the Pole what he was doing and he replied,"I'm hanging myself." Your supposed to put the noose around your neck not your waist." said the onlooker. "I already tried that," replied the Pole, "but I couldn't breathe."