Today's exclusive: an interview with CIA Agent, USA taking further steps in aTO, bonus: miscommunication issues - what you must know when talking with Spaniards.
1. CIA interviewed!
One of our reporters managed to get in touch with CIA agent, who for the obvious reasons wants to stay anonymous.
Here we go:
FP: Everyone are in awe of recent operations revealing the threat of French pTO on US soil...
CIAA:Yeah dude, we totally revealed them
FP:...however some people keep on insisting that evidence brought by Brits may be inaccurate due to the fact that they speak two different languages.
CIAA: Yeah, dude, but ya know - Brits are now our pro-friends so they wouldn't lie. Besides dude they were wiped, occupied, washed down into Channel by French so many times that they've learnt French.
FP: Oh, now I understand - being occupied and learning foreign language during that period clearly makes fail translation false.
CIAA: Ye, tho now Brits after all that wipes speak a freaked up English... sometimes it's easier to get Canuck and make the talk in French.
FP: I think they've always speak like that... but but to the action: many people wonder what are the other 'classified' steps you've taken to infiltrate that wicked group.
CIAA: Yo, well, I suppose I shouldn't talk bout that but the truth is that we read minds.
FP: No shit - so you just used telepathy? I hoped for some Bond action...
CIA agent fighting foreign TOer
CIAA: TBH it was a routine check of what people think and one of our guys heard 'Ajay contacted me'. And since then we knew they are bad.
FP: Wait, what - so if Ajay contacts someone then it's a proof of hostility?
CIAA: It's a proof that there's something rotten.
FP: But he contacts like 95% of population on regular basis, 3 times a month...
CIAA: Yeah, that why we do routine mind readings of 95% of population twice a day.
FP: Wouldn''t it be easier just to read his mind - I mean it's reasier to read one guy than few thousands...
CIAA: Dude hell no, dude. We can't read his mind - if we do we come in contact with him!
FP: So what?
CIAA: We'd become possible enemies of the state. We cannot let our mind readers to become enemies of the state. Dude, that would totally ruin our agency!
FP: But you could use one mind reader to read Ajay, throw him on a blacklist and then use another mind reader to keep the first one at bay. That wouldn't harm anyone since one way or another you read minds that came into contact with Ajay.
CIAA: So wait, what... Hey dude, you've heard we found a French pTO?
2. Serbian aTO mission in USA failed
America loving Serbian aTO unit decided to take a big step in helping USA in maintaining their sovereignty and fighting the threat of EDEN pTO.
Friday night was a first step - whole action was meant to strike fast and not let EDEN claim any parties.
EDEN apparently forgot about elections since they've didn't even come up with candidates that would run for PPs.
Unfortunately they've lost by a close margin - at the same time remaining EDEN TOvers woke up, once again meddled in internal affairs by loudly shouting and voting for US SoD Gnilraps, which helped him to win by a close margin with Serbian aTO candidate.
We are still waiting for WH statement concerning those elections. Especially concerning the fact that acting SoD got so much support from EDEN. Some people openly ask for CIA investigation and clear answer: what are connections between acting SoD and rouge group of EDENites. Might be that he is actually an undercover agent of EDEN?
3. Success on fighting the pTO threat
We're happy to announce that Civil Anarchy's policies of loosing bonuses almost reached its climax in Aquitaine. Rubber region was successfully returned to France, tho not without the help from a Country That Names Should Not Be Spoken (because they piss off people from this country or Greeks).
Whole operation was possible only due to the joint operation of Spain, Poland and CTNSNBS against the world superpower France. However since apparently Spain, Poland and USA are a part of non-existing alliance help caused a lot of shit hitting the fan all over the world. Most likely Spain wanted to prove that they are a valuable partner for much stronger allies and tried to fight on 3 fronts, despite having heavy problems on 2 fronts.
Also the fact of losing third grain region could upset them.
4. While in Spain... - a bonus for those who does not want to make a huge mistake
In most of civilized countries all over the world ok means ok.
But not in Spain.
In Spain ok means hell no.
Probably that was the reason why CWNSNBS miscommunicated during the joint operation against world's superpower France.
5. Meanwhile in Poland
Daily contest of Bringing walls in RWs up to 80% is still being held daily.
Also Polish MoFA briefly complained that due to the large number of EDEN tourists prevents them from helping baltic allies, due to the fact that Polish Army has to watch over rampaging tourists.
We believe he may soon complain also about tourists from CWNSNBS.
Also for those who may find it difficult to reach any of Polish officials:
if you rub a bottle of vodka and say PL MoFA 3 times you can possibly summon him to your service.
And that would be all for today!
Ariakis - the yellowish Pony of Doom