Pfeiffer.......sigh

Day 1,776, 08:06 Published in USA USA by Jefferson Locke

*edit* I didn't think about this before, so thanks to Jetsmets for the comment. Pfeiffer = Henry Arundel.

Lets start this out with an admission: I’m not a huge Pfeiffer fan. I’m fairly new, so my sample size is small, but from what I have seen he is not the nicest human being in this game. It’s probably not the smartest thing to come out and say this about someone who has been around forever and knows five million times more than I do, but it’s important to start out with that admission, so that people will know where I am coming from. I’m not writing this because I think Pfeiffer is a good person. I’m not writing this because he has been nice to me, or because I have sipped the kool-aid. I’m writing this because at the end of the day……

Hold on, this is gonna be hard……

Pfeiffer is the right person for the job.

After that I need to see something nice……..


God I love science.

There, all better. Now that we got that out of the way, I can explain why he is our best choice.

There are few things I believe to be 100 percent true in this game, and Pfeiffer best personifies these things. The first is that parties are what make a country great. The second is that those in power, especially the Potus, should have checks and balances on their power. Pfeiffer, as much as I hate to admit this, acknowledged these two things and addressed them with one move: Making Fingerguns his VP.

Fingerguns has been preaching the first point for years; to be exact, the reason that I believe the first point is because I ran across and read Fingerguns’ articles when I first started. She makes a reasoned and logical argument for this, and has for a very long time. Parties are the lifeblood of a country, and the best way to educate new members of our country.


Fingerguns dressed as me! I dressed like her once, but it wasn’t as adorable

Strong Parties = a strong Amurrika.

For the second point, with power comes ego. Thus, when someone gets power, they should have someone around to keep them honest. And if you know anything about Fingerguns, you know that no matter who you are, she will tell you if she disagrees with an idea, and if need be, she will slap you around to prove the point. Picking Fingerguns shows two things. It shows that Pfeiffer knows that he needs that balance to be the best president possible, and he knows that fixing our nation’s problems are more important than the satisfying of his ego. And ego is lame. Ego can make someone do something really stupid, only to realize later after epically failing that their decision was a terrible one. (See Bruno, Ajay).

Now that those two things are settled, let’s move on to Pfeiffer himself. Whether you like him or not, if you are logical you have to admit to two things. First, that he bust his rear end in this game. He is always on, and you know he won’t disappear for two weeks of his administration. If anything, we’ll get tired of hearing from him. Well, we’ll get more tired of hearing from him.

Pfeiffer, change of plans…..how about Fingerguns does the talking?


FG doing the talking

Second, He knows his stuff. If anyone has acquired enough knowledge over the years to get us out of this mess, it is Pfeiffer. He knows about the economic, military, and political aspects of this game enough to do what needs to be done, and he knows who among the other players would best serve the goal of strengthening our nation in his cabinet. And do not underestimate this last point. Picking the cabinet is one of the most important things a person can do. A prez has roughly 4,000 things going on at one time, so guess who does most of the things that affect all of us commoners. A good cabinet can make a bad president look good, but a bad cabinet can drag down anyone.

One last thing, and this is most important. No one, and I mean NO ONE, knows how to screw with Ajay/RGR better than Pfeiffer and Fingerguns. No one is better at screwing up Ajay’s plans (other than Ajay himself, see last article) than Pfeiffer. And this should be one of the most important things to look at in this upcoming election. At the end of the day, defending our country from FYROM isn’t going to matter much if we don’t have a country to defend. If anybody can speed up RGR’s self-destruction, it is Pfeiffer/Fingerguns.

Sure, he has burned a lot of bridges. He lurks on IRC and waits around until he can come on and jerk the place up a little. He will demean someone for saying something, and then say the exact same thing. Let pfeiffer be pfeiffer. These things do not matter. The ONLY thing that matters is having a unified America and picking the person most capable of fixing the problems we have. There are a lot of people who think differently; who think that picking between Pfeiffer and RGR is equivalent to picking between a crap sandwich and a crap burrito. I would have to disagree. A better comparison is this: America is in a world of crap right now. Pfeiffer is the toilet paper. You forget he’s there, and don’t want to be seen in public with him…..until you have a mess.

Pfeiffer is the best man for the job.

And Pfeiffer, if you read this, which I doubt you will because I’m pretty much a nobody( and if you do you will comment with something along the lines of “who let this kid talk derp derp”), just know that even though I may not like you very much, and you definitely don’t like me…..I respect the hell out of you sir. Good luck, I really do hope you win.

Bunnytoaster(of love)