I have been called many things, but I am not just a country bumpkin, I am the American zeitgeist, relentless, thick-skinned and determined. Today I announce my Candidacy for the Presidency of the United States.
Now, let me show you, just the tip .... of the iceberg.
If I am elected President of the United States of America I promise the return of Barrack Oblige, the greatest Whale to ever grace this game.
I also promise to turn London into the 51st state taking Cuba's old place as the previous 51st state.
I promise to extend Derpy's dividend forever! It's your money, you deserve it.
I promise media activity, I promise to breathe life into this game as I have done countless times before.
I also promise to kick Cerb out of court, prosecute Pfeiffer for his countless crimes and bring Wiggy, the worst chief of staff ever to swift justice.
Prime Minister Chickensguys