A Break in the Monotony
Day 2,352, 13:44
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Published in United Kingdom 
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by
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by Massacar
Hello Everyone, It is I, Massacar
So there's been a lot of political stuff going on as per usual in the eUK. This article is just to give everyone a couple of seconds away from the nasty eWorld of politics.
I do not take creative credit for the materials expressed below.
René Descartes walks into a bar and orders a drink. When he's done, the bartender asks him whether he wants another. Descartes says "I think not." Poof! He disappears
(Cogito ergo sum)"I think, therefore I am"This is my favorite
As pothead walks down the road, a genie appears in front of him. "I'll grant you two wishes," says the genie.
The pothead replies, "I want a never ending joint."
The genie says, "As you wish," and gives him the joint.
The pothead takes a long drag and says, "Awesome! I want another one!"
What's the difference between light and hard?
You can go to sleep with the light on.
What's the definition of a good farmer?
A man outstanding in his field
What do you call a man with no arms and no legs playing in the leaves?
Russell!
What did the worker at the rubber band factory say when he lost his job?
Oh Snap
What do Eskimos get from sitting on the ice for too long?
Polaroids
What did one snowman say to the other snowman?
Do you smell carrots?
What do you call it when a dinosaur crashes his car?
Tyrannosaurus Wrecks
What do you call a pig that does karate?
A PORK CHOP
Why did the cookie go to the hospital?
Because he felt crummy.
What do you do with epileptic lettuce?
You make a seizure salad!
Hope you were all mildly amused.
Vote, Sub, Shout
Thanks for reading, o7
Massacar
So there's been a lot of political stuff going on as per usual in the eUK. This article is just to give everyone a couple of seconds away from the nasty eWorld of politics.
I do not take creative credit for the materials expressed below.
René Descartes walks into a bar and orders a drink. When he's done, the bartender asks him whether he wants another. Descartes says "I think not." Poof! He disappears
(Cogito ergo sum)"I think, therefore I am"This is my favorite
As pothead walks down the road, a genie appears in front of him. "I'll grant you two wishes," says the genie.
The pothead replies, "I want a never ending joint."
The genie says, "As you wish," and gives him the joint.
The pothead takes a long drag and says, "Awesome! I want another one!"
What's the difference between light and hard?
You can go to sleep with the light on.
What's the definition of a good farmer?
A man outstanding in his field
What do you call a man with no arms and no legs playing in the leaves?
Russell!
What did the worker at the rubber band factory say when he lost his job?
Oh Snap
What do Eskimos get from sitting on the ice for too long?
Polaroids
What did one snowman say to the other snowman?
Do you smell carrots?
What do you call it when a dinosaur crashes his car?
Tyrannosaurus Wrecks
What do you call a pig that does karate?
A PORK CHOP
Why did the cookie go to the hospital?
Because he felt crummy.
What do you do with epileptic lettuce?
You make a seizure salad!
Hope you were all mildly amused.
Vote, Sub, Shout
Thanks for reading, o7
Massacar
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Comments
sehr gut
Danke
I'd take two never ending joints...
i like a bit of variety though..... nothing worse than building up immunity 😉
The amusement I endured was intensely mild, but worthy of a vote.
I never claimed to be a skilled comic (Thank god, otherwise i'd be the biggest liar in the eUK). I just thought that there should be more entertainment articles out there to provide a chance at variety.
I fully appreciate it! I try to inject awful humour into these dark times, too. A worthy endeavour.
[removed]
I am therefore I drink