The War of Nave's Toe - Awards long overdue.

Day 280, 19:11 Published in Canada Canada by Adam Sutler

Good Evening Canada,

Allow me first to apologize for the double post, and this further interruption of our electoral coverage and warring posts. I do, like many of you, appreciate the comforts of every day routine: the security of the familiar, the tranquility of repetition. I enjoy them as much as any bloke. But in the spirit of commemoration - whereby those important events of the past usually associated with someone's death, or the end of some awful bloody struggle - are celebrated with a nice holiday, I thought we could mark this August the 26th, a day that is sadly no longer remembered, by taking some time out of our daily lives to sit down and have a little chat.

You see, it was on this day, four months ago that the War of Nave’s Toe was finally ended by the signing of a peace treaty between the Federation of Canada, and the United States of America. This document secured peace for months ahead, and ended the bloody struggle between our nations. While this document was controversial at the time, and I suspect it still may be; it is important not to let our memories pass back to the hate and the bitterness of the contract itself; but to the war which preceded it… to the birth of our nation.

On April 11th, mere days after aborted invasion attempts by the vile former U.S. President Nave Saikiliah, the United State of America finally voted to go to war with our fair nation. Why? It was claimed that because we were so small, we could not adequately administer ourselves, and that any nation not capable of mounting its own self defense it should not be allowed to exist. But on that very day, the world stood up to Nave and his ilk and made their position known. The invasion of eCanada would not and will not be tolerated under any circumstance. Though we had not a single Mutual Protection Pact at the time, support flooded in from brave individuals from around the world. Swedish mercenaries, Spanish Ravens, Portugese soldiers, and Italian adventurers; Romanian freedom fighters and even American e😜atriots joined forces with our small, but fiery army, to push back the American invaders.

But Nave and his fighters, knowing not what they did, began to abuse a glitch in the shiny new war module. The hospital system, designed only to heal one once per day, was being used countless times by Nave and his fighters; creating the American Immortals: hundreds of Americans were slaughtered that day, only to come back to life due to their illegal sorcery. A black cloud rested upon eCanada, as all provinces but PEI, Newfoundland, Iqaluit and the Northwest Territories fell to the American immortals. The captured eCanadians, I myself among them, refused to give up; and we took our call to the highest authority; and pioneered a new form of warfare! Lo, we didst begin psychological warfare on a grand scale, devastating American moral with our angry cries, our patriotic rhetoric, and our non-stop posting of beer commercials.

But lo, the Admins did hear the angered cries of the eCanadians, and saw fit to right the situation. With full wellness restored and the Hospital glitch fixed, the eCanadian Armed Forces, together with her international allies came together to beat the now-mortal Americans back! In the course of a scant few minutes, the allied and Canadian forces recaptured all eCanadian territory… save Manitoba.

And then, the Admins pulled the plug. The cries of anger rose once again within eCanada, so close to taking back our beloved homeland; as Nave and his treacherous ilk breathed a sigh of relief. The Admins had halted the war for several weeks, allowing both sides to build themselves up again. But it was here where the American war machine failed them.

Foreign fighters and eCanadian soldiers swarmed in and out of the United States, stealing and consuming their wartime products, as the Americans attempted to do the same; they could not overcome the endless supply of foreign goods now flooding the eCanadian market.

Soon, with the war module re-implimented, the American army fell apart. Without food, weapons, or payment, many soldiers refused to fight. Nave attempted to win the battle of Manitoba himself, only to fall numerous times to the eCanadian defenders… and frequently halted by a brash young Mercenary named Alucard Bloodlust.

Seeing defeat upon the horizon as he wasted hundreds of gold upon the battle, Nave sought the assistance of the Pakistanis to take Manitoba back… only to fail once again. But lo, as Canada and her allies poured into Minnesota and North Dakota, hellbent on revenge; another shadow fell upon eCanada…

Faltnor the worlds most inactive President, had returned.

Seeing victory at hand, yet fearful of the future; Faltnor signed an peace treaty with the desperate Nave Saikilliah… a peace agreement which established a 3 month Non Agression Pact, and 200 Gold to be paid directly to Faltnor.

And the anger was directed to John Wilkmot, who was asked to draft the treaty; for no one could take it out on Faltnor, who refused to run for office again. And lo, Wilkmot became a scapegoat which would nearly destroy the Canadian Nationalist Party… until a young buck named Adam Sutler inherited the throne… but that is another tale for another day.

Yes, my friends; it is time that eCanada finally recognize all that our allies have done for us.

It is time to award those who so richly deserve it.

The following veterans shall be hereby awarded the Canadian Victory Cross for valor and excellence in the War of Nave’s Toe!

1. Alucard Bloodlust – International Mercenary.
2. Zhuge Liang – Leader of the Spanish Ravens
3. Vincent Vega – Distinguished Spanish Warrior
4. Garp Bensenhaver – Pioneer in the realm of Psychological Warfare
5. Billy Bob Joe – Pioneer in the realm of Psychological warfare
6. Banach – Distinguished Canadian Soldier
7. Demokratikos – Norse Saboteur
8. Mr. Barbossa – American Saboteur
9. Tvond – Distinguished Swedish Soldier
10. Mortimer Jenkins – Iron Monger and Soldier
11. Uraczak – Pioneer in realm of Psychological warfare
12. Dr. Mohammad Mossadeq – Distinguished Iranian soldier
13. Joe Aitken/James Allan – Distinguished Canadian Soldier

To all these recipients, not only do you have our eternal gratitude, but we now consider you all to be honorary citizens of eCanada.

Until the next time, God Keep our Land Glorious and Free!

And as always,

England Prevails!

- Adam Sutler
President of Canada
Veteran of the War of Nave’s Toe.