[SCfCP] SgtChewy for CP

Day 2,074, 21:47 • Published in Switzerland Switzerland • by sgtchewy

Yay. This is for Penguin and EcoFreak, who have both been waiting for ages for me to run. Well, that day is today. I am finally running for president. I honestly can't say that I know that I'll make a good president. The amount of time, effort and time that go into being president may be too much for me, but I doubt it. I have experience with exhausting eRep jobs. Don't believe me. Check my resume. I'll post it here, though I hate doing it because I always have the niggling feeling that it is a little like bragging.

Commander of the Swiss Guard (Best job, evah!)
x1 SC of CoT (Ever try whacking your head against a wall for fun?)
x6 Member of Swiss Congress (This honestly doesn't take much work.)
x1 MoFA (I actually loved this job.)
x1 MoInfo (The job I was worst at.)
x1 MoInterior (The job I was best at.)
x1 vMoD (I didn't do much.)

Having a good resume, and just wanting to be president should never be the only reasons for becoming president. The only way to make a run for president sound genuine is to propose changes to the system. I can't say that I have drastic changes to make. If it isn't broken, don't fix it. The defense system may need some minor adjustments, but it won't be life changing. I'd love to say that I deserve the position, but then I'd sound like a pretentious a$$. Plus, it wouldn't be true. My work ethic is terrible. By that, I mean that I'm a lazy slacker (Yay for redundant words!). I wouldn't trust me to do anything. I mean that. Do you know long I have been telling myself that I should write a Swiss Guard recruitment article? It's been around 1 year. I still haven't done it. I am a procrastinator to the extreme.

So far, I have told you that I don't have a good reason for becoming president, and that I'm even more lazy and time wasting than the typical office worker (and you thought that was impossible). That makes me the most honest person politician you've met. (That wasn't very honest.) Unfortunately, honesty is the only reason I can think of as a reason to vote for me. Sux. I really could use another reason.

I was told that voting demographic studies, statistics, and test audiences, or whatever, show that I need a slogan that can boost my case. So here it is: Sgtchewy: Vote for Honesty. That is Honesty with a capital H, which is completely different from actually honesty. Remember that.

I'd insert pictures, but as I mentioned, I'm lazy. Also, I'm under time constraints. I'll post a cabinet at a later date. PM me to apply for a job. Someone remind to get a political guru to edit my articles so that I don't say any more things that I regret. Something tells me that the first thing he would tell me is to delete this article. Meh.

I'm running. That's all you need to know. You can skip the rest of the article. Thanks.