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G’afternoon lads o7,

Two days in and government miraculously limps on - no plague of locusts, incoming nuclear apocalypse or suchlike that usually correlates with the beginning of an Appleby presidency. Indeed, no major crises other than the usual stark national indifference (a worthy start and preferably where we’d like to keep it). Alas Parliament has not been quite as lucky, the Speaker no doubt scammed out of his org by yet another Nigerian prince which has put minor delays on our immediate legislative agenda.

But so long as the music plays, we dance. Your ministers have been reasonably busy trying to, err, look busy. We’re also, despite appearances, more than happy to take yer on and train you up so that once all the swag has been safely looted, you can have the opportunity to govern the dregs…

Muh deputy has also come up with a novel approach to ‘competitive’ events 😃



Foreign Affairs Brief

MoFA Introductory Article

The Yanks, and now the Irish, have knocked on my door about a Training War. As much as I’d love to show off the eUK’s stunning military might, I doubt it would be sensible to open two fronts at once (even if they aren’t genuine wars). Whilst the yanks were first in the queue this doesn’t mean they have it in the bag – cabinet and parliament will discuss which they would prefer over the next few days, if indeed they do want to sign one.

Belgium have rejected our demands of immediate annexation, thus the government will be discussing informal invasion plans within the week. It also appears Germany has decided against their invasion of France over their loss in the Euros. Peace in Europe may last an unlikely couple more days…



Defence Brief

Mod Orders

If sponging off the government is a hobby of yours, we’re more than happy to oblige. Vote and shout the MoD orders and we’ll drop yer 5 Q7s to help you on the field. Further, coordination has usually been an issue so Boaty has made this ‘ere Gdoc that should be updated throughout the term with our priorities which I’d recommend bookmarking.

As promised we’re also bringing back national strikes with their own dedicated supply, with the further aim of setting up power-index based leaderboards with opportunities of more glorious taxpayer-funded rewards to blow the treasury on. If you’re half decent at graphics we could probably do with your help in making prizes all the extra bit sexier…



Financial Affairs Brief

MoF Financial Report 27th June - 4th July

Our initial plans to scrap the Woldy’s Angels Act altogether have been delayed slightly as we consider alternative means to preserve the act whilst keeping it relevant – the main issue being successive governments ignoring their responsibility under the Act to portion off funds once they meet a certain threshold, at £400k I believe (we’re currently sitting on just under £1.3m). One proposal would be to halve the current deposits and designate them as the last-resort fund, clearing the other £200k for use on the monetary market.

We also plan to press ahead with the raising of food & weapons import tax to 20%. We will study the effects for around a week before publishing our research and recommendation to Parliament.



Home Affairs Brief

MoHA – Making Gold

If yer poor and hopeless then by definition there hasn’t been much luck thrown yer way by the Great eRep God of Malice & Chance. Luckily our shiny new MoHA is ‘ere to pull you up by yer bootstraps with a few tips of the trade to finally independently finance your crippling drug addiction again. MoHA will also be working with the MoF for those interested in training ground loans and suchlike within the week.

Further, our previous promises of mindless spending on pointless and possibly self-destructive events have not been forgotten (well, yet). In the next few days we should see the beginning of the first government-sponsored spam wars, with a bonus subsidy for entertaining acts of general barbarism and pointless article production. Keep yer eyes on the media for updates soon!

Cheers lads o7