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The ILP Convention Massacre (a spectator's eye view)

Tag 1,925, 05:28 Veröffentlicht in Ireland Irland von James Keiller

It all began on Monday morning with a shout from Independent Labour Party (ILP) apparatchik, Winston Hope Smith, calling on people not to vote ILP as the Party had been a victim of a PTO. This raised a number of possible scenarios:
WHS has gone rogue
WHS has been hacked
There be pirates!

We just want a home ;__;

A quick look at the list of ILP candidates up for election told a familiar tale. ILP Party President Cydp had defied the Party apparatus and turned the list upside-down. The vestigial remnants of the old ICA were back and they were open for business. In trademark jaunty defiance, WHS was made to walk the plank and was cast to the bottom of the list, languishing in 33rd place.

WHS gets a post-sawc ILP Internal Security briefing

The story had been well covered in recent articles how the elite of a once proud Military/Political movement were being PTO'd from Party to Party, culminating in the indignity of finding themselves in a Kurgan Laundry formerly known as The Patriots Party. Unable to stomach the daily hellfire sermonising, they returned like salmon to their ancestral waters. The ILP establishment didn't see it quite like that.

WHS published an article to spread the terrible news. orangejuicemmm (OJ) was soon out of the traps to confirm that a cunning strategy had been underway since before the fall of The Patriots to Kurgan, which was, in fact, part of a divine plan after all.

In an effort to stem the haemorrhage of 2-clicker votes, MR.PADRAIG PEARSE began to shout pro-ILP slogans. In his excitement he gave a shout out calling for votes for The Irish Independent Party, the now defunct predecessor of Independent Voices. The shout was quickly taken down when the error was pointed out. As someone who has often called the intelligence of other players into question, Padraig is prickly about the notion that he might have an extra chromosome or two himself. In his defence, OJ declared that Padraig had been an important part of the takeover, leading me to suspect that Cydp was probably cloned from an encrustation on Padraig's bedroom carpet.

Cydp. Does the job. End of.

When MrConway came home from school the narrative switched to a lone wolf Party President hypothesis. Cydp acted alone on the grassy knoll. No ingenious PTO at all. Bizarrely, he claimed that society had mocked the PTO of The Patriots, conveniently forgetting statements by then CP, Brian Boru, and the heads of all the main parties published in response, deploring takeovers as socially divisive.

Out and about with Mr Ginge

It was only when IBhoy came home from walking his ferret that a coherent strategy of avoiding the use of sentences in favour of a focus on electoral slogans came into play. Shouts like "Vote ILP to get this country moving again" had the desired effect, with MikeBane spontaneously combusting in a foul-mouthed hissy-fit which one of his other selves promptly turned around and liked.

For someone like me, retired from public life, eRepublik is mostly about clicking away for small rewards like some pigeon in a behavioural psychology experiment. Every so often, something happens to remind me why I continue to play this game. Yesterday was one of those days. Carry on.



MR. PADRAIG PEARSE Tag 1,925, 05:32

Mess with the best, die like the rest

MUFC992 Tag 1,925, 05:41

Exactly 😛

orangejuicemmm Tag 1,925, 05:41

I like that I feature in this article.

Winston Hope Smith
Winston Hope Smith Tag 1,925, 05:41

How did you get that picture of me in the prime of my youth?

MUFC992 Tag 1,925, 05:42

Kunts couldn't compete with us so they attacked poor ILP ;__;

Mess with the best, run like the rest

MR. PADRAIG PEARSE Tag 1,925, 05:55

Ur pto of us was irrelevant retard. We had this planned for over 2-3 months

MUFC992 Tag 1,925, 05:57

orly? I know since when is this planned and who planned it so pls stop lies ;__;

if u had it planned u wouldn't cried for few weeks all over the eIreland bro

MR. PADRAIG PEARSE Tag 1,925, 06:42

Lol all part of de plan 😉

Sean MacDiarmata
Sean MacDiarmata Tag 1,926, 17:59

lol you ran what a month or two ago complaining of being bullied which led your mates to pto our party and start this snowball effect. so yes you ran away with your tale between your legs.

ChewChewShoe Tag 1,925, 05:43

no me no vote

MR. HANK SCORPIO Tag 1,925, 05:45

"When MrConway came home from school"

MUFC992 Tag 1,925, 05:52


Christian II
Christian II Tag 1,925, 05:52

Butthurt people, butthurt people everywhere!

T1nk3r Tag 1,925, 06:09


MR. HANK SCORPIO Tag 1,925, 06:31

James get Der Brad to come back

Releasethe Krakken
Releasethe Krakken Tag 1,925, 06:52

Too bad you didnt plan 16 days ahead as well because then we will have all anti ICA PP'S IN PLACE STOMPING YOU TO the bottom of the shitpile which you were eating out of for 3 months 😃

MR. HANK SCORPIO Tag 1,925, 06:57

Lol wtf?

Releasethe Krakken
Releasethe Krakken Tag 1,925, 06:59

the kunts not james . there is already talks and inter party messages flying around. what you thought we were going to applaud you?

Releasethe Krakken
Releasethe Krakken Tag 1,925, 06:53

ps almost thought you were pro ICA bossman but nice turnaround and article in the end.

Cydp Tag 1,925, 07:44

Glad I could be a source of entertainment for everyone 🙂

Voted + subbed cause this article made me laugh

Grainne Ni Mhaille
Grainne Ni Mhaille Tag 1,925, 07:51

Ofc there are pirates. Peh.

Viktor Kurgan
Viktor Kurgan Tag 1,925, 07:57

You PToed the only party who tried to save you from salvation of STO.

You abused their support of young players

You corrupted Cydp and made him a moral failure of this country....a joke...

And you could stay in Equilibrium saving your souls from damnation..

Sean MacDiarmata
Sean MacDiarmata Tag 1,926, 18:02

a high number of their members were constantly saying pass the popcorn etc on our articles about the pto.

The Irish William Wallace
The Irish William Wallace Tag 1,925, 12:33

"You PToed the only party who tried to save you from salvation of STO." x2
Not in those exact words, but in the end that's all you guys did. Good article, sums it up well.

Sweet Drinker
Sweet Drinker Tag 1,925, 12:52

When Patriots was originally PTO'd you were beside yourself with joy, I saw your shouts Mike.

The Irish William Wallace
The Irish William Wallace Tag 1,925, 12:53

No you didn't? I was one of the few people who actually tried to help them.

Sweet Drinker
Sweet Drinker Tag 1,925, 13:00

The 1st month, not this month

Sean MacDiarmata
Sean MacDiarmata Tag 1,926, 18:05

loads of ILP were laughing, look back at the articles we released at the time of the pto...nothing but ILP laughing about it.

irishbhoy1967 Tag 1,925, 14:54

ILP elected a PP by a 30 vote margin. Please do not try to say the now defunct ILP helped Patriots in any way. So shut up talkin' scutter plz.

The Irish William Wallace
The Irish William Wallace Tag 1,925, 15:38

Yes and by the time I logged on (08:00 eRep time) they were in the high 20s. I ordered for people to move to the Patriot Party and vote for MR.HANK SCORPIO which you can still see on the 'ILP'/labour Party shoutbox..

irishbhoy1967 Tag 1,925, 15:46

I know that Mike, but the damage was done at that stage and it became clear that ILP leaders only opposed PTO's if it was the Kunts attempting one.

If you had really opposed it, you would have planned ahead of time, i.e. any time in the week leading upto the election as it was clear even from that point what was going to happen.

Old ILP leaders find it hard to hide their delight any time the Kunts are beaten in an election.

Anyway, all this is irrelevant, the Left is restored in Ireland, you should be happy. You are welcome to come aboard, we are not a closed cabal like the previous regime that ran the party.

The Irish William Wallace
The Irish William Wallace Tag 1,925, 19:14

I'd be more willing to join if the members did not abandon the Left, use dishonourable tactics, bully people, steal from the treasury, and to say the least move from party-to-party like cheap political prostitutes.

I did try days before when Padraig asked me to help, I called for a national ATO effort for all parties. I admit some of the leadership did not necessarily support this, but I did as PP and CP. I shared in your frustration as my orders were not obeyed by many, unfortunately I do not possess multi accounts either otherwise I would have sent them.

irishbhoy1967 Tag 1,925, 19:44

>dishonourable tactics

You mean playin the game mechanics to get yourself out of a tight spot? We often had to give ourselves whatever advantage we could over Ireland's enemies by using tactics our enemies might think were dishonourable. Using tactics is part of the game, in fact you shouldn't be leading the country unless you're willing and able to use them.

>Steal from treasury

Last I checked, the worst robbery we've had here was carried out by someone who was in the defunct ILP's inner circle, not ours. That was the robbery that hurt Ireland more than any other and saw it fall from the glory that we(the people you now complain about) gave it.

>Party to party like prostitutes

Like you moved country to country to run for CP like Smeagol in search of the one ring?

Sean MacDiarmata
Sean MacDiarmata Tag 1,926, 18:07

^^^ this x 50 million

Colin Fox
Colin Fox Tag 2,751, 20:27

">Party to party like prostitutes

Like you moved country to country to run for CP like Smeagol in search of the one ring?"

Lol this actually made me laugh my ass off

Sean MacDiarmata
Sean MacDiarmata Tag 1,926, 18:08

excellent article james

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