Slivovitz!

Day 2,000, 10:07 • Published in Thailand Thailand • by Mystela


As ❋ Tajlanda's Minister of Foreign Affairs ❋ with all due respect, it is my duty to advise

the plaintiff, resident eSerbia citizen, one Vladislav Milovanovic 83, aka author of the attempt to willfully woo & seduce

the defendant, resident eTajlanda citizen, one 11anajiT, aka Tajlanda's Minister of Education,

that I cannot give my Official Seal of Approval to this foreign affair, not only because I cannot find my official seal, a small matter that I will take up with Tajlanda's Minister of Defense, but more importantly because,

I sense that this foreign affair, between these two parties, will not bear fruit!

As all eCitizens of legal age know, in order to produce this nectar of the gods, one or more parties must have fruit, a proven fact after much innovative, but failed experimentation with potatoes by Tajlanda's Prime Minister.

Futhermore, the plaintiff's edits to the original wooful seduction attempt, to further affect the defendant's behaviour, cannot produce fruit & therefore are fruitless...

I have reviewed exhibit A, as provided by the defendant & authored by the Commander of the Mobile Infantry of Tajlanda & have deemed that it is circumstantial evidence, has no relevance to this foreign affair & is therefore inadmissible.

In rendering this decision, I have consulted with Tajlanda's Governor & have received confirmation that the goal of all honest eCitizens, should be to produce the aforementioned fruit & to consume the byproducts of said fruit, or the best facsimilie thereof, in healthy quantities in order to produce successful foreign affairs.

In summation, let it be known that those who are able to pass the rigorous tests of Tajlanda's Citizenship requirements, with the proviso that our daily quota of proud hillbillies & firey women has not been met, are welcomed in Tajlanda, especially if they are muscular & able to produce fruit!

From this day forward, I trust all eCitizens will be wiser, have lower blood pressure & be able to conduct fruitful foreign affairs.

I must go now, to a huge building where the men wear robes, no not the court house,
where I will say a special litany to the Supreme One, no not the CP of Tajlanda, aka our beloved dictator,
mea culpa, mea culpa, mea culpa, to grant that -

All future foreign affairs between our two eNations, shall be of a more collaborative kind, filled with happy words like, Slivovitz!!

tl;dr
Labatt 50! 😛