My top 25
Old Man Jenkins67
My top 25 drinking stories.
Told a guy in a bar that I owned a saw-sharpening business and set an appointment for him to bring in his saws.
Told a guy in a bar that I owned a transmission shop and set an appointment for him to bring his car.
Pissed my pants in San Diego.
Lost my car in Las Vegas
Lost my car in Tijuana.
Accidentally stole a car.
Threw Vice Presidential china off the balcony of a hotel.
Fell asleep in a bar restroom and woke up after closing time.
House-sat for someone I did not know for an entire summer.
Accidentally committed a hate crime.
Re-routed traffic on a very busy street so that all cars were forced to drive through a resident’s front yard.
Convinced all the patrons in a bar that I was the mayor of St. Louis.
Gave a guy a tattoo.
Sat in the owner’s seats at a St Louis Cardinals game.
Mowed a friend’s lawn at 3am.
Invited a bum to drink with me for Happy Hour.
Got in a fight with the bass player from the band Faith No More.
Stole the golden arches from the side of a McDonald’s.
Pissed in John Wayne’s boot prints at Mann’s Chinese Theater in Hollywood.
Stole a keg of beer from a pizza parlor.
Got robbed by a stripper in Las Vegas.
Got robbed by a prostitute in Tijuana.
Threw up over the side of a cruise ship only to spray all of the passengers on the deck below.
Got charged $4 extra by a cabbie for “farting in cab.”
Joined an Elks Lodge.
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The Modern Drunkard.
Comments
This is truly a work of art. You should be proud.
Solid stuff, this is something to be proud of, something you can hang your hat on.
Why the song reference?
I can suggest to not drink any more, but I know it will be useless.
Did losing a car and stealing a car happened the same night?
We all strive for greatness, but I cannot claim nearly the same level of accomplishment. o7
is this true
Here's a gem, I missed 2 planes bound for New Orleans (doing shots at the airport bars) and they finally let my drunk ass on the last plane of the night - I was so trashed that the flight attendant sat next to me during the trip, I got some interesting signals from her, and ended up having my wedding ring rolling all over the cabin of the plane, with every passenger actively helping me look for it!
Never had the life-experience's; but,have been to many house's that they.didn't now their yard's; didn't even set the table. Have Ha.
o7