Cromstar for Congress: Christmas Carnival and Confused Concoctions!

Day 1,129, 17:01 • Published in USA USA • by Cromstar

Or CC:CCCC for short.

It's the holiday season, and I'm in the mood to run for Congress and pass out some gifts to some people who I feel need one from me!

Yeah, I'm running for my 20th term, America. I need a life, but since I'm still waiting for it to come in the mail, I'll take eRep Congress as a weak substitute.

I could write out a massive platform, but in the interests of honesty, I'll skip the crap. If elected, I plan to be rude and grouchy to a lot of Congressmen. I'll give sparse, but fully-earned praise when necessary, but ONLY then. I will contribute my knowledge to those topics that affect America (taxes and the economy are on the list this month I can tell you) as a whole, and may even speak on those I think are asinine or silly. Finally, I promise to get PA that Q3 hospital if elected!


(Don't get that last joke? PM me and I'll explain. It's funny for the old people.)

Anyways, moving on to the fun stuff: the giving of gifts!

To Hekter, old pal, I give you the knowledge that, lacking an official complaint from Angelini, your emarriage is still valid. No death certificate to annul it!

To Angelini, my second oldest companion in eRep and my number one VP, I give you Hekter...and by extension, half of the Philippines 😛

To Mattoze5, my oldest political comrade, I can't believe you are dying on me! As a gift, you bro-turned-Canadian, I'll write you a hella eulogy for the old-school CvPers when you pass.

To Josh Frost, current POTUS etc etc, I still can't believe you are eyounger than me! As a gift, I promise that, if ever I get a chance and France hasn't gotten its act together, we'll take the POF spot for you, since you missed out on it in the past.

To CRoy, a simple gift. Your re-education diploma. You've made a good member of the rebellion, son!


PS. The doctors say the scars aren't permanent.

To Fionia, a gift you'll appreciate. Due to the graphically violent nature of the video of me removing a certain body part from a certain person, you'll have to look me up on IRC to get it.

To Krems, a hearty round of applause. You are by far and above the best mentee I've ever had.


A professional stand-in.

To Evry, a bottle of root beer and a plate of bacon. You know why.

To eliwood_sain, I gift a bottle of V8. It's waaay better than prune, you oldfgt.

To Gaius Julius, wherever you are at these days, I'd like to send you a scrapbook of all the crazy stuff we did back in the days of our eyouth. What idiotically optimistic people we were then.

To Alby, I give you 1 USD. Please send your 1 gold in return when you get a chance, k?



To Peiffer, a nice plot of land in the country side where you can keep all your multis on the farm.

To kyle321n, a pledge to break that curse. It'll happen one day, THIS I SWEAR!

Man, there's lots of other friends out there who deserve something...but these ones topped my list this year. So, to the rest of my efriends, there's still hope!

Cromstar
Candidate for Congress for like the bazillionth time
Former

Oh, one last thing. I'm not sending you a gift, PigInZen, but I'm expecting one. A nice side of bacon for X-mas dinner! And if you don't send it, I'll come get it myself.