WHPR [Day 1,083] - Leadership, Arm America, and Spain

Day 1,083, 18:38 • Published in USA USA • by James S. Brady Press Room
It's Time For... Something

I don't know what that something is. I'll get back to you. in the mean time, you need to know who are the shadowy overlords living on the castle atop the cliff cackling as lightning thunders in the background. I'd go into more depth, but I recall doing this same sort of spiel before.

President: Alexander Hamilton - Clearly. If you needed me to tell you this, go to India.

Vice President: Gulden Draak - Came back to us in heroic fashion. Now he's a heartbeat away from the presidency.

Chief of Staff: Myles Robinson - He's leading the team that actually makes us do work. I don't like to do work. Therefore, I hate him.

Secretary of State: "gagah" - If you try and get ahold of him on IRC and he doesn't respond, it's because they don't have real internet in Texas. Also, he works hard at making his department actually function. So much effort I wouldn't ever be able to give.

Secretary of The Treasury: Dimension - REPTAR

Secretary of The Interior: Justin McCravok - This guy has a hard job. He basically sends crap to the entire nation and mass messages all of them. I'll give you a hint: he has a lot of free time on his hands. Also, more patience then me.

Secretary of Defense: Max Wallingbottom III - This guy has an amazing name. If we weren't such patriotic Amuricans, I'd say we give him the title "Lord" so he could have even more unnecessary fluff in his name.

Secretary of Technology: - Laxnsor He can probably teach your grandma how to use Skype.

Oh, and then there's the greatest Secretary of Media of all time. Whoever the hell that is.

Arm Yourself, America

Your new Secretary of Defense has some intruiging ideas for both attacking and defending. Personally, I think he's stepping outside his jurisdiction. But, whatever. Not my call.

Arm America will allow American citizens to not only arm themselves, but to get food as well. This will happen during important battles and campaigns. It's a really great idea and it should let everyone do more damage for America and its allies.

Speaking of allies,

Hungary

Just kidding.

Spain

They're our bros. They need our help right now. Spain has a history with the United States. During World War 3, while we were being attacked and ravaged Spain was suffering the exact same thing. Now, we aren't. We can save them.

I expect all Americans to follow the Department of Defense Orders. Spain needs us now.

Don't hate me,

Kentel
Best Secretary of Media of all time.