Earth calling Plato... Come in, Plato...

Day 3,092, 19:06 • Published in USA USA • by Gnilraps
Circus (Mandatory listening)
Day 3092 of the New World
May 8, 2016




Perhap’s we’re to blame.

We complained that Plato had made things “too simple”.







Honestly, Plato, it wasn’t a challenge to see if you could create meaningless complexity. We were just venting. Forgive us. Don’t punish us like this… we can’t take it any more.







Gnilraps proudly brings you:
Resource Wars, keys to controlling your nation’s destiny:

1 - Keep track of all four divisions in all your battles.
2 - Keep track of what minute every battle is in.
3 - Keep track of how many domination points are needed for the next token.
4 - Keep track of how many domination points are being accumulated by your nation per minute.
5 - Remember to keep track of what minute every battle is in.
6 - Keep track of every other nation’s domination points.
7 - Keep track of every other nation’s accumulated points per minute.
8 - Control every one of 168 battles.
9 -Direct your tanks to raise walls to over-speed certain nations’ domination points.
10 - Direct your tanks to lower walls to slow down other nations’ domination points.
11 - Direct your tanks to perfectly accumulate domination points for your nation.
12 - Don’t lose track of what minute every single battle is in.
13 - Control every mini-battle in every open campaign so that new campaigns open when needed.
14 - Don’t let any new battles open when you are trying to control your Domination points.
15 - For God’s sake, keep track of what minute each and every battle is in.
16 - Never log off eRepublik…
17 - Don’t even blink.
18 - Remember, no user-scripts are allowed in this game. So don’t even THINK about it.
19 - Keep track of all four divisions in all your battles.
20 - Keep track of what minute every battle is in.
21 - Don’t forget to update your CP’s allocation screen.
22 - Double check the stupid f**king map to make sure you aren’t blocked out of a resource.
23 - NEVER check your email, you’re likely to miss something in eRepublik.
24 -
25 - No problemo.






Plato,

This is the stupidest piece of garbage you’ve ever even imagined. And I say that as someone who remembers the "El Dorado" missions...

It is inconceivable that you would think that any one of the 194 people left playing this game would find this even remotely compelling.

Please announce Resource Wars Volume 3 sometime before the end of the year.

Thank you,

Gnilraps and everyone else who give’s two craps about this game.







I mean, I’ll bet you’ve had some really bad ideas cross your desk over that last 7 years or so. We all give you credit for NOT acting on those particular really stupid concepts and missions and events and updates that your crack team of expert game-designer-gypsies floated for you that you actually managed to avoid. Really. We can’t even begin to imagine…

But we are left wondering what the hell you were thinking lately…

Did this just… sort of… slip through your quality control measures?





Or are you just punishing us with this detritus?




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